


My Life As A Weapon

by krissiew



Category: Hawkeye (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-26
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2019-07-17 21:51:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 27,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16104533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/krissiew/pseuds/krissiew
Summary: Hawkeye and rookie agent Red survived the mission but not unscathed.  It makes the journey home...interesting.Back at base Stark keeps getting in the way.  As does Fury and an ex causes trouble. They seemed destined to always almost have sex.





	1. Maybe it was a bad idea...

**Author's Note:**

> Avengers AU where Hawkeye is unmarried.

“Clint I don’t want to drive all the way back to New York. I’m tired, I’m in pain, I’m covered in someone else’s blood and in case you’ve forgotten so are you. I need a change of clothes, I need a shower and I really, really need to sleep. Please, please, please stop at the next town.”

“I’m not stopping. If we keep going we’ll be home in maybe three/four hours, you can do all that then.”

“Please Clint.”

“No.”

“Well if you insist on driving home you’re going to do it in complete silence.”

I switched off the radio and crossed my arms. He raised an eyebrow as if to say challenge accepted. He was right I’d never be able to shut up for three hours but I could at least try. He didn’t even wait that long, in an immediate bid to contradict me he put the radio back on. I switched it off again, he switched it back on, I switched it back off and every time he reached over to try and turn it on again I slapped his hand away. After another few attempts he finally gave up. For a minute I thought I’d won but then he smirked at me. That stupid boyish smirk that usually meant he was up to something, that smirk that I loved – and he knew it.

“Okay. You asked for it Red.”

For what? He started singing. If he could hold a tune it wouldn’t be so bad but the boy was tone deaf and his singing was…painful. It didn’t help that all the songs he knew were written before 1950. I started laughing. So much for not making a sound for the rest of the drive home. He knew he’d won so stopped singing. Thank God for that, I put the radio back on.

“Clint please at least stop somewhere we can buy clean clothes and grab a quick shower.” 

He looked at me. I gave him my best puppy dogs eyes and he sighed then relented. Twenty minutes later we pulled into the main street of a town we’d never heard of and hobbled into the first clothes shop we found. We got a few funny looks and I couldn’t decide if they were ‘that guy looks familiar’ looks or ‘look at the state of them’ looks. It didn’t prevent them from serving us. Ten minutes later we walked out of the shop with new outfits and directions to the nearest motel, I went to the pharmacy next door quickly and picked up a few supplies and five minutes after that Clint was checking us into the motel. There was only one room, that didn’t matter we weren’t staying. 

The room was tiny, there was one king sized bed that took up most of the room, one chest of drawers and two side tables – that was it. It was painted a horrible hot pink colour and the bed linen was stark white. Where were we? It felt like we’d stepped back in time. Even the phone looked like it had been here for at least a few decades. Please, please let the shower work. I ran to the bathroom with my new clothes before Clint could and locked the door behind me.

“Oi, who said you could shower first?”

“Bite me Barton. I’ve got more blood on me than you do.”

I could hear him laughing through the door. I literarily had to peel some of my clothes off me. Looking at them on the floor I realised how bad they must have looked and how bad that fight must have been. Some of the blood was mine but most of it wasn’t - surprisingly everyone left that fight alive. Alive but not uninjured and the bad guys were heading to jail. Job done. Before I put the shower on I unwrapped the bandage on my arm. The cut was deeper than I thought but if cleaned it, bandaged it up again it would be okay. Hopefully. I had a quick look at myself in the mirror. I had a few other cuts and scrapes, definitely some bruises and since it hurt every time I moved I suspected a cracked rib too. Someone could have a look at it when we made it back to New York. I would survive though, I’d certainly came out of scrapes much worse than this.

The room might have been old fashioned but the bathroom was fairly new and the shower was amazing. I stood underneath it until the water changed from red to clear and then I used the cheap shampoo to wash the remaining blood out of my hair. By the time I stepped out the shower I was beginning to feel like myself again. I tipped my new clothes out of their bag and stuffed the blood-soaked clothes inside. If I never saw them again it would be too soon. I brushed my hair back into a braid and put everything but my jumper on then headed out – hopefully Clint would help me rebandage my cut – it was in an awkward place and I wasn’t sure I could do it by myself. 

When I walked out Clint was sitting on the edge of the bed wearing nothing but a pair of boxer shorts. I stopped walking and just stared at him, I’d seen him barely dressed a few times - normally when everyone was getting changed for a mission but in this setting it seemed so…intimate. He stood up and I kept staring. He had to have noticed. I didn’t care, he was…just wow. Those arms were. I mean I knew he was fit – given the job we did we both had to be - and he was an archer he needed powerful arms but still. Wow. Okay stop this. Stop staring.

“About damn time Red, that was the longest shower ever.”

He was joking, kind of. He was laughing as he walked – sorry limped - by me. I couldn’t help it, my eyes followed him as he walked past me. I just stood there after he locked himself in. Yeah, he was gorgeous, yeah we’d flirted but no this was not going to happen. Bad idea. Nope. Still I could look at him. Right? There was no harm in that. Okay I had to move, I could at least try and bandage this thing up myself. I grabbed some swabs and sterile water and cleaned the area. Or tried to, every time I touched it I flinched in pain but still I managed to do it. I then raided the bag and eventually found the wound closure strips I’d bought. I managed to get one on but was struggling to do anymore when I heard someone sigh and with a voice dripping with sarcasm say:

“Why on earth are you trying to do that yourself? Here let me do that.”

I looked up, he was still only wearing boxer shorts and now his hair was wet and he smelled like lime. (I probably did to thanks to the motel shower gel.) He walked over, snatched the strips out my hand and then started putting them on. I flinched every time he touched me. He was great at many things but this wasn’t one of them. He didn’t have the gentle touch needed for this kind of thing, when he went to put the bandage over it he pulled it too tight and I moved my arm away from him. We needed to get this guy back to first aid training.

“Red stop being a baby, give me your arm back.”

“Don’t put the bandage on quite so tightly this time then.” He sighed. “And stop sighing at me.”

“This is what I get for going on a mission with a rookie agent.”

I moved my arm again but this time it was so I could elbow him in the ribs. Rookie agent? I’d been with the team for three years – I think I was well past the ‘rookie’ stage thank-you for very much. There was no way I’d hurt him by doing that but he said ‘ow’ anyway. I looked at him. He was smiling. Why was he smiling? He took my arm back and finished wrapping the bandage around it.

“Rookie agent? Really Barton? I think I did about as well as you out there and I’m not the one limping.”

“No, you just have a cracked rib and a huge cut on your arm.”

I just grunted. How long would it be before he saw me as something other than a rookie? What would I have to do to prove myself to him? I jokingly elbowed him in the ribs again and then went to put my jumper on. A move that made my ribs ache. I looked out the painkillers I’d bought earlier – nothing too strong since we had to keep our wits about us and offered two to him. He declined. I stuck them in my pocket – I was sure that he’d ask for them later. Since I was now fully dressed it meant Clint got dressed too – at least he’d just bought himself jeans and a t-shirt so I could still look at those magnificent arms of his. I had to stop this, stop thinking of him as something other than a mentor - or these days a team member. There was no way he was feeling this way or thinking that way about me. Unfortunately. 

“I guess we’re heading back to the city now?”

He shook his head then crinkled his nose – it was kind of adorable. Wait a minute no? We weren’t. What was he planning instead? He wasn’t about to admit I had been right was he?

“You were right Red.” He was – wow. “We haven’t slept in what fifty hours I think we should just stop here. Stay tonight and head to the city tomorrow. That is if you don’t mind sharing a bed.”

No I didn’t mind sharing a bed, the idea of it made my heart race. It shouldn’t, I had to stop thinking about him like that. How many times was I going to tell myself that today? Until I listened to myself I guess. I was about to make a sarcastic comment about his acknowledgement that I had been right when the phone rang. We both just looked at each other. What the hell? No-one but the desk clerk knew we were here, maybe Clint’s credit card had been declined. Maybe, but the more likely explanation was unfortunately a tad more sinister. On instinct we both went for our weapons. Neither of us succeeded – they were still in the car. How dumb were we? Clint answered the call, the second I heard his first ‘Yes Sir’ I knew we were okay. Ish.

How the hell did Fury know where we were? Oh of course, our trackers. How could I forget? What must he be thinking – he’s tracked us down to a motel room after all. I heard Clint explain what happened during our last mission and why we were here and after another few ‘yes sir’s’ I realised we had another set of orders. Great. When was the last time that man had given us a day off? I looked at him once he hung up the phone. Why had Fury not just call our mobiles? Why use the room phone – was he making a point? No matter where we were he could always find us…we already knew that. 

“Fury’s happy for us to stay here tonight as long as we head out first thing tomorrow. They’re not in a huge hurry for that SD card apparently.”

I sighed. When Fury sent us to get it - what three days ago - he made it sound like the fate of the world depended on it. Then again, he made every mission sound like that. I sighed. Some days I wished I’d picked a normal job but I’m sure the nine to five grind would bore me to death.

“Don’t look at me like that, it’s not my fault.” How was I looking at him? “I saw a diner not too far from here, let’s grab some food and then come back and get some sleep.”

I nodded but my heart sank. I hope it didn’t show on face. If all he was thinking about was sleep then he really wasn’t thinking about anything else. I suppose I already knew he wouldn’t be but still…I had to get over this…I guess crush and move on to…who? Given how busy Fury kept us my dating pool was kind of limited. Let’s just get through tonight.

“I think we should bring our kit on from the car first, it was kind of dumb leaving it in there in the first place.”

We headed out to the car and brought everything in. It was too conspicuous for him to carry his bow around but I holstered my favourite gun to my hip before we headed out. We might be in the middle of no-where but you never knew who could be following you. It took us longer than normal to walk the short distance to the diner since the idiot next to me was limping. I asked him what exactly had happened to his foot and all I got was ‘It’s just a sprain’. It was more than that and I wasn’t sure why he felt like he had to lie about it but I didn’t correct him. 

Once we were seated in the diner he asked if I still had the painkillers on me. I smirked as I passed them to him, he called me a know-it-all rookie and I had to try very hard to resist the urge to stamp on his sore foot. It had been fifty something hours since we’d slept and about that long since we’d eaten something other than a sandwich or power bar. The smell of food in the diner was making me salivate. When it came time to order I think I ordered one half of the menu and Clint the other half. She just looked at us then asked if we were serious. Yes we were serious, we were starving. We sat chatting as we waited and then as we ate. I don’t think we were making too much sense, we were that tired and every so often we’d just start laughing for no reason. Our waitress gave us a few funny looks but I was past caring. 

Thirty minutes and so much food I never thought I’d eat again later I was done. I sat with a bad coffee and listened as he ordered himself a dessert and a bag of cookies to go. Seriously, how can he eat anything else? I sat with my coffee and watched him devour his cheesecake. I kept looking at his bag of cookies. Those cookies looked good and I would be to eat just one of them. One tiny cookie would be fine. After he caught me looking at them he offered me one. I declined. He offered again, I paused and then said no. He didn’t look convinced but didn’t ask again.

After his cheesecake we paid the check and headed out. It was darkish outside now, maybe we’d been in the diner longer than I’d thought. As we were walking back to the room I realised he was right. I wanted one of those cookies, they looked too good not to eat. He would share them. Right? 

“Do you know what I’ve changed my mind. I want a cookie now.”

“Tough.”

“Give me a cookie Barton.”

“Not a chance rookie.”

“Please?”

“Nope.”

I couldn’t let him win, I wanted one of those cookies and I had the advantage right now, he couldn’t run and I could. So, I grabbed the cookies out of his hand and started running. He yelled out and started running after me – or he tried too anyway. About twenty yards in I had no idea where I was supposed to be heading. I turned left. The words ‘big mistake rookie’ were yelled in my direction. It took me another few yards to realise what he meant. I’d turned into a dead end. Crap. I started heading back out but by then he’d caught up with me. He grabbed my arm, pushed me against the wall then pinned me against it and with his free hand snatched the cookies out of hand. Staring right at he growled then barked out one word:

“Mine.”

I knew he was talking about the cookies. But that tone, that growl made it feel like he was talking about something else. Or was I just dreaming again? After that no-one moved, no one said anything. My breathing hitched. The way he was looking at me, he’d never looked at me like that before. It was the way I had looked at the cookies earlier. I was beginning to think that maybe, just maybe he was calling me his and if I was really that lucky then maybe he was going to kiss me now. He moved his hand from my arm and then traced it down the side of my face. Oh boy he was. I latched my arms around his neck. I wasn’t going to let him move now. Slowly he leaned down to me. This was real, he was going to kiss me. I couldn’t wait, I started leaning up to meet him. It seemed to take a lifetime for our lips to meet and once they did they barely brushed against each other. This happened a second time and I wasn’t sure if it was because that was how he wanted our kiss to go for now or if he was uncertain about it. Was he expecting me to pull away from him? I moved a hand to his back, used it to push him against me. He moaned softly as I did. His lips brushed against me a third time but this time they stayed there and as we were about to sink into it, finally, a familiar voice in the background spoke:

“Look at this. I always hoped you two kids would get together.”

Seriously. He was here. Now. The moment was well and truly gone. Reluctantly I moved my head away from Clint and in doing so banged it against the wall. I put my hand up to my head, yeah that was stupid and it hurt.

“Stark. Are you actually here or is it just the suit?”

As Clint moved away from me (dammit) I watched as Tony emerged from the suit. Smirking. 

“You two are lucky, I’m actually here. Glad I am too, I got to see that. We’ve been betting on how long it would take you two to…”

Clint didn’t let him finish. He snapped at him:

“Why are you here you Tony?”

His tone when he spoke was…curt was putting it nicely, he was clearly annoyed. I was too.

“The boss decided he wants the SD card tonight. I don’t normally run errands but I was going for a test run in the suit anyway so here I am.”

I reached up to my neck, pulled off the locket hanging around my neck and dropped it into Tony’s waiting hand. He opened it…why wouldn’t he trust that it was in there? I was already irked but now I was annoyed as Clint was.

“It’s in there Stark.”

He laughed, shut the locket back over and put it around his neck. He just looked at the two of us. 

“Well have fun kids, see you tomorrow.”

With that he stepped back into the suit and a few seconds later flew off. Clint moved to face me. Neither of us said anything. What do we do now? I wanted to say something the tension, the silence was killing me and what I found myself saying was:

“It’s maybe a good thing he turned up. It was probably a bad idea huh?”

The second I said it I hated myself for it. Maybe it was a bad idea. Maybe, but I still wanted to kiss him and now I never would. Crap. He looked…disappointed I guess. He obviously wasn’t expecting me to say that (neither was I). Maybe this hadn’t just been a spur of the moment thing for him, maybe he…It didn’t matter now. I’d blown it.

“Whatever you say rookie.”


	2. I need you to kiss me...now.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After an almost kiss and saying something stupid Rookie Agent Red has to find a way to get Clint to kiss her again.

Clint stared at me. Had I really just told him that kissing him was a bad idea? The way he was looking at me now. He clearly didn’t think so. Crap. He didn’t say anything else, he looked away from me and started hobbling back to our room. Yeah, he was pissed off. I didn’t blame him. I wanted to run up to him, say I didn’t mean it. Kiss him. I wasn’t sure he would want that anymore. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Months, I’d spent months wanting this exact moment to happen and in one second I’d blown it. I blamed Stark. I blamed Fury – except I didn’t really. It was my fault. Stupid. I sighed and just stood there watching him walk (hobble) away from me. Maybe I should sleep out in the car tonight? I didn’t think he’d want to be anywhere near me right now.

“Oi rookie. You fancy getting your ass beaten at a game of pool?”

Maybe he wasn’t that mad after all? I was so tired and playing pool wasn’t going to help my ribs any but if made things easier between us then so be it. I could endure the pain.

“What makes you think you’d win?”

“I usually do rookie.”

He might be talking to me but if he was still calling me rookie then he was still annoyed. Maybe after a few games he’d go back to calling me Red? I could hope. We walked into what looked like a games room – or at least it used to be. Inside there was only the pool table and an arcade game that looked like it hadn’t been plugged in for months. It was painted the same hot pink our room was. I very much doubted all the pool balls were here but they were. What we struggled to find were pool cues. We managed to find just one and it was game on.

We’d set up the game in virtual silence but once we started playing things thawed out a little and at least we were talking to each other now. Every time I bent down to take a shot my ribs hurt and it was way too early to take more painkillers but I didn’t complain. I didn’t think I’d get much sympathy from him if I did. After he won the first game he was back to being his usual dorky self around me. But not long into the second game that changed. I started to notice something. He was flirting with me, teasing me and I was teasing him too, flirting right back. By the third game there was nothing subtle about it and I was beginning to think that maybe I hadn’t blown this thing after all. I wanted him and he clearly wanted me. Then there was that thing Tony said. Something about betting on us getting together? Had he, had everyone seen this coming before we did?

As brief and as chaste as that kiss had been it kept coming back into my mind. I couldn’t seem to stop thinking about it. How far would things have gone if we hadn’t been interrupted? I wanted to kiss him then and I still did now. What made me tell him that it was a bad idea? He would never try to kiss me again and the idea of that broke my heart. I looked at him. Maybe there was a way to take the comment back, let him know what I wanted. He’d been flirting with me, maybe he would try to kiss me again? Maybe. Then again it could just be wishful thinking on my part. I was too tired to think straight. I was also too tired, too sore to play a decent game of pool and I never really stood a chance of winning against him so after losing my third game in a row we headed back to our room.

Neither one of us spoke during the short walk and once we were back in the room we both tried to act normally, tried to ignore the fact that we’d just been flirting and before that kissed (kind of) but the tension was palpable. At some point we’d need to talk about it. Just not tonight. We both needed to sleep and I guess, despite everything that had happened tonight, sleep was all that would be happening. With no nightwear to put on I stripped down to my vest top and pants and curled up at the edge of bed, throwing the blanket over me. Clint stripped down to just his boxers and I tried not to watch him but my eyes kept flicking in his direction, I couldn’t seem to stop them. He lay down on the opposite end of the bed and the physical space between us represented something else too – and it was killing me.

I couldn’t fret about it now, it wouldn’t change anything. I was so tired that despite everything that had happened I was sure I would fall asleep straight away. I didn’t, I couldn’t. My mind was racing and my entire body seemed to be hyper aware of the man sleeping barely a few feet away from me. A man who not so long ago had kissed me. I may have told him that it was a bad idea, but I’d never told him I didn’t want to do it again and right now the thought of his lips on mine or even just having his arms around me was all consuming and all I wanted. I had to do something or at least try. I moved myself in the bed. I moved away from the edge and though I stopped short of placing myself right next to him I think I was pretty close to him. I could hear him breathing and for a minute I thought he’d fallen asleep. If he was that was it, the moment would be gone and I wasn’t sure I’d ever be brave enough to do something like this again.

He wasn’t asleep, he turned around, moved himself closer to me and then threw an arm around me. He started slowly brushing his hand up and down my arm. It was crazy how good that felt. I wanted this, wanted him but now that it might actually happen I wasn’t sure if I could do it. I could, I would. I wanted him and I had for months now. If he felt the same way, if this was actually happening I would let it. I didn’t care if it was a bad idea. I moved my hand so I could trace it down his arm, once I reached his hand he took mine in his. He leaned down to me and whispered in my ear:

“So Red. Kissing is a bad idea but cuddling half naked in bed…that’s okay?”

“I said it was a bad idea Clint. I never said I didn’t want to do it.”

He didn’t say anything and the silence that hung in the air was deafening. He never moved, I couldn’t even hear him breathe anymore. It was like he wasn’t sure what to do next. I’d just given him permission to do…well something. What I really wanted was for him to kiss me. Now. I couldn’t remember wanting anything more but I didn’t want to be the one to move first. That silence was still hanging in the air though and it had to break. Soon. One of us had to do say or do something, this was killing me. I was seriously considering moving away, telling him to forget about it. If it was taking this long then he maybe didn’t want this as much as I did. I’d just made an idiot out of myself.

That’s when he growled. It was deep and loud and after the silence the sound of it seemed to echo around the room. He moved away from me and if he hadn’t just made that noise I would have been disappointed but I knew something more was coming. I couldn’t wait. He pushed me on to my back and then just stared at me. I stared right back, those green eyes of his had an intensity in them I’d never seen before and I knew, I just somehow knew that he wanted me as much as I wanted him. That whatever this was, it was about more than tonight and that was fine by me.

“Red. I’ve want this for a long time. I never thought…are you sure?”

I nodded. Was I sure? I’d never been more certain of anything in my life. He never moved. He just stared at me. Did he need to hear the words? Need something more than a nod. How could he not know I wanted him, how could he not know that I’d felt this way for months? If they’d been betting on us back at HQ then everyone else must have known too. Then again I never knew he wanted this either. Seriously, how dumb were we? How long had he been looking at me? The intensity was still there but it had changed a little. It was like he was looking at me for the first time. I couldn’t take this anymore.

“Barton.”

“Yeah?”

“I need you to kiss me…now.”

He did. He moved so quickly that he was just a blur in my eye line. His lips crashed against mine even as he moved himself to lay himself on top of me. My ribs twinged in pain, I didn’t care, he could break them. I wrapped my legs around his, one hand found its way to the small of his back the other moved to his neck. I had him now and I wasn’t letting him go. Ever. Unlike our brief kiss earlier, this kiss was rough and heated and oh my God was it perfect. I arched my back up to him, I need to be as close to him as I could. As I did he moaned. After a minute or so he broke of the kiss and I was bereft for a few seconds until he started kissing my neck. My breathing hitched at that moment and I tightened my legs around him. He traced a hand down my side and when he reached the edge of my top pulled it quickly over my head, threw it to the floor.

He didn’t move again and for a minute we just stared at each other. How did we manage to go for so long without doing this? I don’t think I’ll ever be able to keep my hands off him again and honestly I didn’t want to.

“God Red you are so beautiful.”

I traced my hands up his toned chest and when I reached his shoulders pulled him down to me. The feel of my skin against his was…there were no words. He started kissing my neck again and I just melted into him. Somewhere in the background I heard my phone ring.

“Ignore it.”

Like I was planning on doing anything else. Nothing else mattered right now but him. I let it ring noisily in the background. When it finally stopped ringing his started. Someone was determined to get us. I had a good idea who. When no-one answered the landline rang. That’s when we gave up. I reached over to answer it. We were being called back to HQ. Now. We weren’t even getting to drive back, they were flying us back. That’s when I heard it. The sound of a helicopter.

“Are you kidding me?!” I hung up the phone as Clint begrudgingly left the bed and walked to the window. “Yup, that’s one of Stark’s. There must have been something on that SD card.”

“Yeah there was. We’re going back to work tonight.”

This was over. For now. Dammit. He sighed and I completely understood why. He started getting dressed, I did too. Every so often I looked over at him and I would catch him looking at me and every time our eyes met we both smiled. Every time he did that I just wanted to run over to him, to finish this thing we’d started. I couldn’t though, fate of the world blah, blah, blah. Wait a minute. If Stark was here then he barely had time to get back to HQ with the SD card and then fly back to get us. What the hell was on that thing? Where on earth were they landing a helicopter around here anyway? Why couldn’t he have taken just a little bit longer to get here? Dammit. Damn you Stark.

Clint walked - sorry limped - over to me once we were dressed and when he reached me wrapped his arms around my waist. I latched my arms around his shoulders, I liked being this close to him, finally being able to touch him the way I wanted too. I could get used to it. He rested his forehead against mine.

“To be continued Red.”

“Absolutely Barton.”

He moved to kiss me and that’s when we heard him:

“For the love of God will you two put each other down.” Clint sighed, I did too and we moved away from each other. “Playtimes over kids, time to get back to work.”

Damn you Stark. How did you even get into the room? If I didn’t know any better I’d swear he was interrupting us on purpose. We grabbed our gear and headed out the room. We’d taken maybe three steps when Clint reached over and took my hand. I looked at him and smiled. Damn it I loved this guy and I had a feeling he felt the same way about me. I had to wonder, how long it would be before we got back to that ‘to be continued’.


	3. Cracked ribs and a fractured foot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back at HQ Fury had questions but all Red wants is to get Clint alone.

Stark made sarcastic comments about us all the way back to New York. Of course he did, he wouldn’t be Tony if he left things alone. I just sat there trying to ignore him, Clint though sniped back. He should know better by now, all it did was make Tony worse. Thank God it wasn’t a long flight. I tried to figure out what could be on that SD card and what use Fury thinks we’re going to be. Neither of us were fit to go back in the field just yet. 

We were ushered straight out of the helicopter to a meeting room where Fury and Maria were waiting on us. The second we sat down Fury slid over a laptop. I immediately recognised two of the four faces on it. One had caused the laceration on my arm, the other Clint’s foot injury. Both were now in a jail cell somewhere. Stark pointed to a third face, he was currently in jail for trafficking alien weapons thanks to him. Why were called back was simple. What did we know about the fourth guy?

The name underneath the face was: Bill Lassiter. I looked at Clint then Tony. Neither of them appeared to recognise him and neither did I. I suspect Fury already knew that. He wanted us to walk him through what had happened when we retrieved the SD card. What had we seen, heard? Was there anything that could help us find him? I wish there was. He hadn’t been there, there had been no trace of him at the house. How he was linked to them? He was the man in charge – before we retrieved the card they had no idea what he looked like or what his name was. 

I guess we weren’t finished with this particular mission just yet. Maria asked us a few more questions and were told not to leave the base for a while. Why? I wanted to go home. I was beginning to forget what my own apartment looked like but when I asked Fury wouldn’t let me, let us. He wanted us on hand ‘just in case’. I didn’t think there wasn’t anything else we could tell him now. Was there? We were sent to the medical bay. The second we left the meeting room Clint took my hand. I hadn’t expected him to do that, not here anyway but I wasn’t going to argue with him. The gesture made me smile. I turned to look at him he smiling too. He was still limping and it seemed to be getting worse. What exactly had he done to that foot? We were going to the right place to find out.

“Do you think we missed something? Fury seems to think we should know who he is.”

“I don’t think we missed anything Red but that whole mission was one big chaotic mess so maybe. I doubt it though.”

I didn’t find that reassuring. I’m not sure he believed that himself, he let out the longest sigh. Something had been bothering me about the whole that mission long before Fury called us in. I couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it was though, there was just something…something. It was like it was at the edge of my vision and I couldn’t quite see it. Not yet anyway. That sigh made me think he was thinking the same thing. We didn’t have time to talk about it right now though.

The medical bay was two floors above us and Clint went to walk up the stairs. I pulled him back and he threw me his best confused look.

“Not on that foot Barton.” He sighed again. “Seriously.”

He relented and we stood together waiting on the lift. When he started stroking his thumb across my hand I looked down at it. It was only a small thing, something no-one would notice if they were looking at us, but it made me shiver and I couldn’t help but smile. I snuck a look at him. I wanted to say something, anything to him but the lift pinged and the doors slid open.

It was empty. That never happened around here, then again it was pretty late. He stepped into it and pulled me along with him. It was a shame we were only going up two floors. This might be the last chance we had to be alone for a while. It would have been nice to do…something. That ‘to be continued’ was stuck in my head. For now I would have to be happy just to have his hand in mine.

He hit the button for the floor we wanted and we stood together watching the doors slide silently shut. A few seconds after the lift moved he reached over and put the alarm on. The lift stopped, the alarm screeched into life and he turned to look at me grinning. I guess he had the same thought I had. We stood there staring at each other for a few seconds and I rested a hand on his chest and slowly started tracing it upwards. We couldn’t do much right now, but I could kiss him. We could have that much. We were in a lift Stark couldn’t interrupt us here.

He let go of my hand and used it to cup the side of my face with it while latching the other arm around my waist and pulled me into him. I flinched as a pain shot up from my ribs, he couldn’t leave his hand there it hurt too much. I took that hand and moved it somewhere I thought he’d like more – my ass. He did, he growled in my ear. 

“I cannot wait to get you alone later Red.”

I couldn’t wait either but we’d have to. Who knew how long we’d be at the medical bay for and what would happen after that. Fury clearly had plans for us. I didn’t say anything back, he never let me. He moved his hand from my face to the small of my back and pushed me into him. It hurt my ribs. I didn’t care. He leaned down to me and brushed his lips gently against mine. 

A voice came over the speaker in the lift asking if we were okay. Damnit. Building maintenance were a little too efficient. He moved away from me, gruffly replied that we were fine and put off the alarm. The lift started moving again. I looked at him, he looked about as frustrated as I felt right now. One quick chaste kiss. That was really all we were getting right now? Before he even had time to take my hand again the lift doors open and we were literarily facing the medical bay. Jess was standing at the entrance waiting on us. We started walking out to meet her and I heard Clint wince in pain.

“What the hell happened to you two?”

Clint grunted. I, sort of, laughed. It was either that or cry. Once we walked into the medical bay Jess immediately separated us by sending Clint for an x-ray. She sat me down on the treatment room couch, asked me about my injuries. She looked at my arm first, assured me it wasn’t infected and redid the dressing, after that I was sent to x-ray. I walked in as Clint walked out, all we could do was look at each other. It took five minutes to get the x-ray and it hurt like hell. After that I was sent back to Jess.

She was still talking to Clint and I hovered close by but not to close. I didn’t want to interrupt or overhear anything I wasn’t supposed to. After a few minutes she called me in. Clint went to stand up but I pulled him back down, I didn’t mind him hearing anything. He immediately started playing with my braid and when I looked at him he gave me a sly smile. When I looked back at Jess she seemed surprised. I guess not everyone saw this coming then. She never commented though.

I hadn’t broken a rib but I had fractured a couple. That would explain why they hurt so much then. There wasn’t much that could be done about it. Take some painkillers and try to take it easy for a while. I wasn’t cleared for field work for at least a week. I could live with that but I’m not sure Fury could. After that she left us alone. I asked Clint what she’d said about his foot. It wasn’t broken, he’d just chipped a little bit of bone off it. He had to rest it, take painkillers but he’d be fine in a few days. I think he was underplaying it and I don’t know why. Jess came back, made us take the first of our painkillers in front of her, gave us more to take away with us, gave me some more dressings and then sent us away.

Clint took my hand again and we walked out together, well he hobbled. No-one seemed to need us right now. Where do we go now? We hovered outside the medical bay for a few seconds. If no-one needed us then we could be alone, get to that seemingly illusive ‘to be continued’. Neither of us were allowed to go home so that left one place. We seemed to have the same idea at the same time. We headed in the direction of the staff living quarters. Neither of us spoke. Every so often we would just look at each other and smile.

After a few minutes we arrived. His room was first. I didn’t want to presume anything but I wanted to go in with him. I looked at him, he was staring at me. What was he thinking? I couldn’t tell. I watched him as he opened his door. He still hadn’t gave me any indication that he wanted me to go in with him. I leaned up to him, kissed him quickly on the cheek.

“I guess I’ll see you later. Sleep well.

“Red get your cute ass in here.” I didn’t move. “Now.”

He grabbed my wrist and pulled me into the room with him. I didn’t fight against him, why would I? I wanted this as much as he did. The second he shut the room door he pushed me against it. I squeaked in surprise then yelped in pain. My damn ribs. He was going to have be a little more delicate with me – for now anyway.

“Sorry. Was that your ribs.” I nodded. “You okay?”

I nodded again. He traced his hands down my arms and the feeling of his skin against mine sent a shiver down my spine. That done he moved a hand to my waist and moved the other under my top, digging his nails into me. I moaned softly. Was this actually happening, were we finally going to get to that ‘to be continued’? He started tracing the palm of his hand slowly up my side. I latched my arms around his shoulders. Now that I had him I wasn’t going to let him go anywhere. He slowly leaned down to me, come on Clint. This was excruciating. I leaned up to him brushed my lips against his as my eyes fluttered shut. He was slow and tender when he kissed me, his hands barely grazing my body as he touched me. I needed him to be less rough with me but I didn’t need him to treat me like I would break at moment, I wasn’t that fragile.

I traced my hands slowly down his chest and when I reached the bottom of his top pulled it off him. He let out a low guttural growl then grabbed my hands and stepped into me pressing me between the door and him. I supressed a yelp of pain, I didn’t want him to step back. The feel of him this close to me was heady. I didn’t want it to end.

“God Red I want this, want you. Are you sure?”

Was I sure? Was he kidding? I wanted him just as much as he clearly wanted me. I nodded. He started tugging at my top. As he was pulling it off I noticed a new red mark on it. It was on his hand too. What? Before he could touch me again I took his hand. He seemed surprised. The bleeding wasn’t coming from his hand, I looked at my arm. Crap. He’d pulled off my dressing. I had to deal with this before anything else happened. He looked apologetically at me. I leaned my forehead against his, traced a hand down the side of his face.

“Don’t worry about it. Give me a minute okay.”

He nodded. We headed into the bathroom and he quickly washed my blood off his hand before heading back to the bedroom. It didn’t take long to stop the bleeding and change the dressing. However we’d managed to pull off the dressing we hadn’t done much more harm to my cut. Just as well really, I had no intention of going back to see Jess tonight. How would I explain what happened?

When I walked back into the bedroom he was lying on top of the bed. I smiled. He really was gorgeous. Those arms. I couldn’t wait until those arms of his were pinning me to the bed. I started walking towards him, I was a few steps away from him when I realised that he was asleep. Seriously Barton? I had been in the bathroom for maybe a minute. I know we haven’t slept for a few days but still. He was snoring, there was no way I was going to be able to wake him and I’m not sure he would thank me if I did. I lay down next to him, rested my head on his chest and closed my eyes. That ‘to be continued’ still hung in the air. Maybe when we woke up…


	4. Were we destined to almost...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clint's going back out in the field despite his injury, Red still can't figure out what went wrong with the last one. Meanwhile Stark seems to great delight in interrupting any time they seem to have alone together.

I woke up to the feeling of someone tracing their hand down my arm. Who had I slept beside and why were they doing that? I opened my eyes. Why was I looking at the banal grey walls of the SHIELD dorm rooms? 

“Morning Red.” Memories of yesterday came flooding back. I smiled, check that, I grinned. Clint. Clint was waking me up. I looked up at him and then immediately slapped him on the side of the head. “Oi. What was that for?”

“That was for falling asleep on me last night.”

He laughed. I wanted to be mad at him, I couldn’t. He was too cute to resist when he laughed. I leaned down to him, quickly brushed my lips against his.

“I’m awake now Red. Are you?”

I nodded. I was definitely awake and more than ready for what I hoped was about to happen. He flipped me onto my back and those wonderful arms of his were finally pinning me to the bed. My ribs twinged – I didn’t care. He leaned himself down on to me and my ribs did more than twinge. It was a pain I could live with, I wanted him more than it hurt. He crashed his lips into mine as he let my arms go. I started tracing my hands down his muscular back until I reached his ass. He moaned in my ear.

Slowly he started tracing his hands up my sides and when he reached them pulled down my bra straps exposing my breasts. He stopped kissing me for a second, just enough time to look at me. When he leaned back down to me he started kissing my neck, cupped a hand over an exposed breast and I arched my back to him. I needed to get as close to him as I could. It hurt like hell, I still didn’t care. I tangled a hand in his hair, tugged it gently and he let out a low guttural groan. He moved a hand to my thigh, slowly started tracing it upwards. It was crazy how good that felt. I moaned softly.

I started tugging at his trousers. They had to go. It was that exact moment that someone chapped the door. He groaned, buried his head in the crook of my neck. Seriously. What the hell? I moved my hands away from him. This wasn’t fair, it felt like we were destined to always almost have sex. I don’t think he was ready to give up on it just yet. He bellowed:

“Go away!”

I laughed. If only that would work. I could guess who was at the other side of the door. He’d probably volunteered to come and get us – just to annoy Clint.

“Either let me in or I’ll let myself in.”

I was right, it was Stark. Clint could yell as much as he liked we were going back to work. We moved away from each other and I sat up in the bed. Neither of us spoke. I looked at him, he looked as disappointed as I felt. I pulled up my bra straps then asked if I could borrow one of his tops, he nodded. By the time I put it on he still hadn’t moved, he wasn’t in a position stand up just yet – not if Stark was about to walk in. I sat beside him, leaned down to him and kissed him quickly. I heard Tony swipe his key card in the door and he swaggered in, a smug look on his face.

“I really, really hate you right now Stark.”

“What did I do?” I glared at him. He just laughed. I guess he’d figured it out. “Sorry kids.” Now it was Clint’s turn to glare at him. We were far too old to be get called ‘kids’ and I was sure he was just doing it to get a reaction from us, well from Clint. “You’ve been asleep, or in here anyway, for almost twenty hours. Time to get back to work. Fury wants you in the conference room.” 

Seriously? We’d been asleep for that long? I knew I was tired but twenty hours? Clint still hadn’t moved and Tony didn’t show any sign of moving either. Why were we going back to work? We hadn’t been cleared by medics yet, there wasn’t anything else we could tell them. What the hell did Fury want? I sighed. 

“We’re on our way Tony. Get out.”

Clint really had to stop sniping at him, it just provoked him. Tony made a sarcastic comment at Clint and left, chuckling to himself as he did. How did Pepper put up with him? Clint looked as unhappy as I felt. Hopefully whatever Fury wanted would be quick and we could go home. I could only hope. I left Clint to get dressed and went to check my dressing. It seemed okay. I wasn’t going to touch it if I didn’t need to. My ribs though were still painful, I found my painkillers and took a couple before heading back to the bedroom.

Clint was now fully dressed, his wonderful arms covered with a long-sleeved t-shirt. I guess it was time to go. Twenty hours? It really didn’t feel like we’d been asleep for twenty-hours. It felt like we’d just walked through that door, I wasn’t ready to walk back out again. Tough, I didn’t have a choice. Clint silently took my hand and we headed back to work. He was still limping as he walked. If anything it actually seemed worse today. What the hell did Fury expect him to do when he was like this?

“How bad is your foot?”

“It’s fine.”

“It’s not fine, you’re still limping. Be honest.”

“It’s…yes it’s sore but I’ve been through worse. I’ll be fine Red. Stop worrying.”

“Did you take your painkillers?”

He shook his head. I sighed. Men. There was no point in pushing the issue. As he was walking down the stairs I could see him flinching in pain. Maybe I should push the issue? I hated seeing him like this.

“Maybe you should…”

“No Red. They made me sleepy last night. Let’s just see what Fury wants and then maybe. Okay?”

I nodded. Maybe was progress. I’d take it. When we reached the conference room Stark, Nat, Maria and Fury were already in there. Why were here was simple. They’d found him – Bill. He was in Staten Island. They’d needed him brought in – preferably alive - as well as any intel that could be found in his home. I wasn’t going on the mission but Stark was with Nat and a team and Clint was going with them. Clint was still limping, he wasn’t fit to go back out there yet. When I said that, everyone including Clint – after sighing loudly – told me that he was fine. I knew I was fighting a losing battle. I offered to go, was told no. This was one mission I was sitting out. I wasn’t fit. Neither was Clint though. I didn’t understand and no-one was going to explain it to me. I was instructed to leave, go and write up our last mission.

I did as I was told but I wasn’t happy about it. An hour later I hadn’t written much, I couldn’t concentrate and something about that last mission still didn’t feel right. I was missing something obvious. Until I figured out what it was I wouldn’t be able to finish the report. A couple of hours later Clint came to see me. He was back in his Hawkeye uniform, his bow and arrows on his back. The boy looked good. I just stared at him as he talked.

He was leaving – he was heading to Staten Island with a team and Nat and Stark. Considering he had just limped in here I couldn’t understand why? What was he able to do that someone else couldn’t? He wouldn’t tell me. I guess I just had to trust him, trust that he knew what he was capable of doing right now. It didn’t mean I had to like it though. He put out his hand for me and when I took it he used it pull me off my chair, he then immediately wrapped his arms around me. I did the same. Maybe, just maybe if I refused to let him go they’d leave without him.

“I’ll be back in a couple of hours, three at the most. Fury’s promised we can go home afterwards.” At last, some good news. “We’ll finally be somewhere that’s Stark free.”

That was even better news. He leaned down to kiss me. He never got the chance.

“Do you two ever stop?” I really, really hated that man. We weren’t Stark free just yet. “Barton let’s go.”

He kissed me quickly and then moved away from me. I watched him, them, walk away. I didn’t like not knowing what the plan was or what Clint’s role was in it given his current state. Even with Nat there to watch his back I still didn’t want him to go. I don’t know why but I had a bad feeling about this. He shouldn’t be going back out there, he wasn’t fit. I couldn’t do anything about it now. Once he was out of my eyeline I went back to my desk, back to writing up my mission report – or trying to anyway.

I gave up after I’d written five sentences in just over an hour. I went to grab a coffee, maybe find Maria. I thought if I could talk through the whole thing with someone who wasn’t there maybe I’d accidently stumble on what I was missing. Coffee in hand I went to find her. She wasn’t anywhere obvious. I was told she was in the control room. Of course she was, she’d be monitoring whatever the team was doing. I shouldn’t go in, Fury might throw me out but I swiped my ID card and walked in anyway.

No-one noticed me as I walked in, they were all focused on the large screen at the edge of the room. Whatever was happening it was almost over. Fury was focused on Stark – he’d just caught Lassiter. Nat was in the house with other team members. Clint was…he seemed to away from everything. He was sitting motionless, bow and arrow at the ready, covering the surrounding area, being back-up. He was okay and if that was his role in this mission then he didn’t need to walk. I still wouldn’t be happy until he was home. I watched as Lassiter was put into SHIELD van with most of the team and driven away. Nat and Stark continued to search the house, looking for anything that could help us work out exactly what he’d been doing and who he was working with. They didn’t seem to be in a hurry. Come one guys I want him home. Still. The mission was over. 

Then it wasn’t. Over that is. I could only see what happened from Clint’s perspective - from the small camera on his suit. But he was suddenly ambushed by three bulky, brawny guys. He couldn’t run from them, he wasn’t fit for that but he didn’t even try. He seemed to drop his bow the second he saw them and put his hands up. He wasn’t fighting them, why wasn’t he fighting back? There was only three of them, he could have easily shot his way out of that. I watched as they seemed to pull at him, they dragged him to a nearby van.

I dropped my coffee. The resulting thud made everyone look at me. I didn’t care. Clint had just been taken hostage. Shit.


	5. We have a mole don't we?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clint has just been taken hostage and there's a mole in SHIELD. So why is everyone acting like everythings okay?

I’d just watched Clint be taken hostage and not one person in the room seemed remotely concerned. Why weren’t they concerned? Why hadn’t he tried to fight them off? It didn’t make sense. Unless…unless the plan was always to let him be kidnapped. I turned to Fury.

“You son of a…you knew they’d take him. You used him as bait? You want to track him to...” 

Track him to where? They had Lassiter, but they’d taken him from his home. There must be a base somewhere close by that they couldn’t find any other way. 

“Red…”

“Don’t ‘Red’ me. He’s injured but that doesn’t matter does it. He didn’t need to be field ready.” Fury had irked me before, been reckless even. But he’d put Clint’s life in danger and that wasn’t okay no matter what the reward. “If anything happens to him...”

Just to prove my point his camera went offline shortly followed by his tracker. No. No. Just no. He couldn’t be dead, he just couldn’t. He was stronger than that, he’d been through worse than this. He had to be okay, we hadn’t had any time together. 

“It’s just his tracker.” I turned to look at Maria. Was she sure? “He’s fine look.” 

I turned back to the computer screen and they pinged on a second tracker they had somehow implanted in him. When had they done that? I didn’t care, he was still alive, thank God for that. They must have removed the first tracker and camera. How did they know do that? He would never have told them and no one but SHIELD staff knew about them. Unless...that would explain why things with our last mission went so badly. They knew we were coming. We had a mole. This wasn’t just about catching Lassiter. This was a mole hunt too.

“We have a mole don’t we?” Maria nodded. “Do you know who?” 

“We have a good idea. We can’t prove it but we’re just about to find out if we’re right. Only five people knew about his second tracker. Two of them are talking you, Clint and Natasha and...”

She never told me the fifth. His second tracker went out. Shit. Now how were they going to find him? I looked at Fury. He seemed unconcerned. He barked at Eckhart and Nolan who were standing next to him.

“Go and get her. Now.” They ran. Who? “Activate the third one.”

A third tracker? Smart. Of course Fury had a plan. We sat and silence for a few minutes and watched the data. His heart rate was fine, he seemed to be okay. They were heading to a barn in the middle of no-where. Great. What was there? They’d better get him back. Uninjured. I looked at Maria. She traced a hand down my arm.

“Don’t worry. We’ll get him back. He knew what he was agreeing to.”

But I didn’t. This is why no-one told me the plan or would let me go. I was just staring at the screen, watching his heartbeat on the monitor, checking he was still alive and listening to Stark ramble on when Eckhart and Nolan came back with our mole. No. Freaking. Way. She’d put my life, put Clint’s life and everyone else’s in danger. For what? I couldn’t help it, I curled my fist up in a ball and punched her in the face. She yelped. Before I could hit her again Maria grabbed me and pulled me back. Now it was turn to yelp, I think one of my cracked ribs had just broken. It was worth it to see the blood now streaming down Jess’s face.

“What the hell Jess? Why?”

She just smirked and kept her mouth firmly shut. She wouldn’t for long, Fury would make sure she talked. He asked her the same question. Silence. Nolan took her to a cell to wait. She would have to wait. We had more important things to think about. We had to get Clint back and if they caught a bad guy or two along the way so be it.

I went back to watching the screen. I spent the longest twenty minutes of my life watching the little dot that was Clint as it slowly moved. Stark, Nat and what was left of the team weren’t far behind him. I listened to stark babble on. Clint’s dot stopped moving when they reached what looked like a deserted barn. At that point Fury tried to send me out the room, I wanted to stay, I wanted to see what happened next, I needed to be sure he was okay. I’d half expected Fury to do this a while ago, I think he forgot I was there. I refused to move. He told me again. When I refused again he had Nolan escort me out. He wasn’t exactly gentle and even if my ribs hadn’t been cracked it would have hurt.

He walked me straight to my desk. The second he left me I went back, my key card wouldn’t work. Dammit. I didn’t have a choice. I went back to my report. At least I could finish it now. I couldn’t really concentrate but I got it done anyway. After that I sat staring into space. Why the hell had he agreed to this? He should never have been asked. Dammit. I hated this, I hated not knowing what was going on.

“Red.” I looked around to see a smiling Maria. “There's something you should see.”

I smiled. Does that mean the mission was over, was he okay? I asked he just ushered back to the room Fury had thrown me out of less than an hour ago. When we walked in Fury was gone. Good. Hopefully he was giving Jess a hard time instead of me. I looked up at the big screen. 

There he was. His bow back in his hand. He was beaten and bloodied but very much alive and hugging Nat. Thank God for that. It felt like I could finally breath again. I listened as Maria talked to them and told them to get home. Nat asked if we managed to find our mole. She smiled when we said yes. She was about to sign off when I grabbed a headset from the poor soul sitting in front of me.

“Barton.” He looked up and smiled. “You okay?”

“I’m fine rookie.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I knew you’d try and stop me and we had to do it this way.” I sighed. “You know we did.”

“You didn’t have to be the bait.”

He looked apologetic. This wasn’t the place to talk about it and right now I was just more relieved that he was okay rather than angry.

“April?” I noticeable hush fell across the room, Nat and Stark turned to stare at him. He’d never, ever used my real name before. He sounded so vulnerable when he said it. “Meet me at the helipad when I get back?”

It wasn’t quite a question but it wasn’t a statement either. He seemed shy asking it. He wasn’t scared, I’d never seen him scared but maybe he was a little shaken. I think he just needed to know I was still here.

“Of course I will babe.”

He smiled. Nat smirked and Stark started saying ‘babe’ on repeat. Shit what had I just done? Now everyone knew and Clint was going to get teased all the way back to base. Maria sighed then sent me to the helipad. I was told to take him straight to the medical bay once he’d landed and to get my ribs X-rayed again too. After that we could go home.

I ran out the door and then up the ten flights of stairs to the helipad. The wait for it was the longest wait of my life. My heart hit my throat when I finally heard the rotor blades, it took another minute to see it and a lifetime for it to land. Once the engines were turned off the gang of three left. Stark came out first. I expected to hear a sarcastic comment with the word ‘babe’ or even ‘April’ in it. I didn’t get that. He hugged me. It was so out of character and I honestly think I’d have preferred a witty, biting comment.

“He’s fine. Don’t look so worried.”

I’d stop being worried about him when I saw him, when we were out of the medical bay and out of any building owned by SHIELD or Stark industries. For now I watched as he exited the helicopter. He had his arm around Nat and I noticed his limp was worse. There was dried blood on his neck, his forearm too – I guess from where they cut out his trackers. His face was bruised and he was clearly in pain. What the hell had they done to him? I walked over to him. 

“I think this belongs to you.”

She smirked at me then let him go and I quickly took her place. She didn’t just have an arm around him, he actually needed someone to lean on for support. I looked up at him. Why, why did he agree to do this?

“Clint…”

“I’ll be okay, it looks worse that it is.”

Yeah right. His tone gave him away, even he didn’t believe that. I sighed. He might not have field ready before this but now he just seemed…fragile, somehow damaged. How damaged he was we were just about to find out. Next stop the medical bay.


	6. Back at the medical bay...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clint and Red are heading back to the medical bay. Of course her ex-boyfriend is on shift. He's not happy...

At the medical bay we were met by Tom. There was a rotation of six staff that worked here - I guess that was five now since Jess would never be back. Out of the five staff members left on staff my ex-boyfriend had to be the one on shift right now. The second he saw us walk in he ran over to help Clint. Once inside he sat him down and asked what had happened. 

Due to the ridiculous amount of dried blood on Clint and his clothes it was difficult to see what exactly was wrong with him. It would be easier, not to mention faster, for Clint to shower and wash it off rather than Tom doing it but would Clint manage that? He nodded. Tom asked him when he had last taken painkillers – it had been way too long, no wonder he was struggling to walk. Tom gave him a couple to take and I took some too. Walking Clint here had hurt like hell and my ribs were agony. I wasn’t so sure Clint would manage in the shower but he wouldn’t let either of us help him and he hobbled off in that direction.

While he was in there Tom and I headed to x-ray. There was usually at least two staff members on shift but since Jess was now sitting in an interview somewhere – hopefully telling Fury everything she knew - he was on his own. Doing the x-ray didn’t take long but it hurt like hell. The painkillers weren’t doing much to help me right now. It was my own fault but I couldn’t make myself regret hitting her. Jess deserved worse than a punch in the face.

Once back in the treatment area Tom looked at my x-ray, Maria hadn’t broken any ribs but the fracture on one was slightly worse. There wasn’t anything he could do for me and the advice was the same. He was also recommending that I do absolutely no field work a while. He could recommend it, after today I wasn’t so sure Fury would pay attention to him.

Clint still hadn’t ventured out of the shower room. I walked over to check on him. I couldn’t hear water running but neither could I hear any sign of someone moving in there. What if his injuries were worse than we thought? What if he'd collapsed in there? I was about to walk in and check on him when he walked out.

He was out of his blood soaked Hawkeye costume and was now wearing SHIELD tracksuit bottoms and a short sleeved t-shirt. Now that he wasn’t in blood-soaked clothes and all the dried blood had been washed away he looked so much better. He was still limping but he did seem so pained when he was walking. He still bruised but he didn’t seem so damaged now. Just a little beaten-up. He smiled when he saw me.

“Don’t look so worried. I’m okay. I’ve been through worse.”

I know he had, I’d been there for some of that but it was different then. He wasn’t, we weren’t…whatever this was. He hobbled back to the treatment room with me. That’s when I noticed it, the cut on his arm was bleeding again. I looked around for something I could use on it, nothing was appropriate so I ran back to the shower room and grabbed a towel, wrapped it around the wound and held it in place as we walked back to Tom.

I sat next to him and watched as Tom numbed his arm before stitching it. It was only then that it stopped bleeding. The cut was bad, they’d been brutal when they cut out that tracker. The cut on his neck was better, they’d been gentler removing that one. Tom was able to just glue that one shut. Clint reached out to take my hand almost as soon as soon Tom started stitching him and started tracing his thumb across the top of it. It didn’t go unnoticed by Tom. I tried not to focus on that, instead I talked to Clint, tried to get him to talk to me about what had happened to him. He didn’t say much, I think that was more because we weren’t alone right now. 

Once he’d done than that there wasn’t much else Tom could do for him. He would be bruised and sore. He was told to rest his foot, like me he absolutely wasn’t field ready and he’d be sure to emphasise that in his report. He was free to go. He hobbled back to the shower room to grab a jumper. As soon as he left Tom started a conversation I was hoping to avoid. 

“So Barton…I thought he was your mentor?”

“He was until a year ago when I lost my rookie status, you know that already though. Why?”

“You seemed to have moved on to a different type of relationship. Does Fury know?” I nodded. “He’s okay with it?”

He hadn’t said otherwise and if he did a problem with it he’d be quick to let us know. I didn’t see why Tom was asking. It wasn’t really his business. Not as our medic and certainly not as my ex-boyfriend.

“Yes.” He didn’t move. “Tom this isn’t…why are you asking?”

“It’s not right. He was your mentor.”

“And now he’s not. I’m not talking about it with you. It’s none of your business.”

“It is a little.” Shit. Really? We broke up eleven months ago. “We never should have broke-up Red.”

What happened next happened both in slow motion and so quickly that it seemed to fly by in a heartbeat. He grabbed my wrist, pulled me towards him and then tried to kiss me. I stepped back from him but he still had my wrist. I told him I didn’t want him and then I asked him to let my wrist go. He just held on tighter. I yanked it away from him. My ribs twinged again. I tried to walk away from him and he grabbed me back again. Did he really think this was a way to win me back? Not that it possible before but it definitely wasn’t going to happen now. He tried to kiss me again and this time not only did I step back but for good measure I punched him in the face, I yelped in pain - stupid fractured ribs. He stepped back. I started walking away.

He’d seemed surprised. I shouldn’t have done that. He shouldn’t have grabbed me either so…shit. Hopefully that was the end of it. Someone tapped my shoulder, I sprung round ready to hit Tom again if I had to. It wasn’t Tom, it was Clint. I had completely forgot he was here. How much of that had he heard, seen?

“Are you okay?” I nodded. He turned to face Tom. “What the hell were you doing?” Tom didn’t move. “When someone tells you no, it means no.”

Clint looked like he was ready to hit him. I didn’t want that. I wrapped an arm around his waist and he turned back to face me.

“I’m fine. Can we just go?”

He nodded. Phew. He wrapped an arm around me but as we started walking away Tom had one last thing to say.

“This isn’t right Barton. She was your student.” 

He stopped walking. I looked at him. He was tensing up, he was ready for a fight. He might be ready for one but he wasn’t fit and this wasn’t a fight he needed to have. It wasn’t his fight. It was mine. I turned back to Tom.

“This isn’t any of your business. You chose to walk away from me. You forfeited any right to comment on my life then. Back off.” 

I pulled at Clint, we walked out together and for good measure he slammed the door behind him. I knew we were about to have a conversation that it was way to early in this…whatever this was but Tom had made it unavoidable. We walked to the kitchen in virtual silence. I made us a coffee and once we were sitting he reached over and took my hand. I smiled. He still looked concerned.

“Are you sure you’re okay? He didn’t hurt you?”

“I’m fine Barton. If I can’t get out a wrist grab I shouldn’t be a field agent.”

“He’s lucky all you did was hit him, you’re trained to do so much worse to someone.” I smiled. I still didn’t think I should have hit him. Next he asked the obvious question. It was time to talk about the elephant in the room. “Can I, should I, ask about what happened with him?” 

“I’m happy to talk to you about it but I don’t really know what happened.” He didn’t look like he believed that. “We went out for a while, just over six months. For the last month he was more distant, we didn’t see much of each other. Part of that was because I was my work schedule got kinda crazy when I lost my rookie status. I don’t know, maybe he didn’t like that I was working more, that I wasn’t always around when he wanted me. One day he ended it, no real explanation. He’s never bothered with me since then until…”

“Until he saw you’d moved on.” I nodded. “You’d never go back…”

I didn’t want him to finish that question, he didn’t need to.

“No never. Even before today I wouldn’t.”

“Did he have point?” Crap Tom had got in his head. “I was your mentor Red. Are we crossing a line that we shouldn’t?”

I reached over the table and took his other hand in mine. Why was he doubting this? He shouldn’t be. 

“Clint you haven’t been my mentor for a long time. Now you’re my fellow agent, my friend …” he flinched at that. That’s not what I meant. I had to walk that back. “and in the last few days something more. We’ve not crossed any kind of line – if we had Fury would have stopped this before it started. Not that…”

“Speaking of which…when are we allowed to leave H.Q? Are we ever going to be in a Stark free building?”

“Maria said we could go home once we’d been to medical. Maybe we should go now before she finds something for us to do?” He nodded. “Can I ask you something before we do?” He nodded again. “Earlier on, why did you use my real name? You’ve never, ever said it before.”

“Red’s your work name right?” I nodded. “When we’re not at work I don’t want…at work we’re Hawkeye and Red but when we’re not, when it’s just us can we just be plain old Clint and April?” I liked that. It was a clear way of separating our work and professional lives. I nodded. He leaned over the table and kissed me quickly. “I like what you called me after I said that.”

I smiled. Of course he did. I guess Stark teasing him about it all the back hadn’t put him off it. It was my turn to kiss him quickly. It hurt to lean over the table, I didn’t care. It was worth it.

“I’ll try to remember to use it again then.”

He stood up and walked round the table to me, put his hand out for me and used it to pull me up to him. Once I was standing he wrapped one of his glorious arms around my waist and pulled me into him. He leaned down to me as he moved a hand to the back of head, tangled it in my hair. He gently brushed his lips against mine a couple of times before we quickly we just lost ourselves in a slow loving kiss.

“Oh my God. Do you two ever do anything else?”

I swear that man waits until the worst possible presents itself before he interrupted us. There wasn’t any other rational explanation for it. I – very reluctantly – moved away from him. Clint kept an arm around me. We really did need to find a Stark free environment. Soon.

“Stark. Don’t you have anything else to do around here?”

“I do Barton. I wanted to check up on you before you left. You okay?” He nodded. “Good. I have a car waiting at the entrance to take you kids anywhere you want to go.”

If that was why he was interrupting him then maybe I could forgive this once. Clint tried to thank him and he shrugged it off. He did the same when I tried. He started walking away. He had one last classic Stark comment left though:

“Be safe kids.”

There wasn’t anything else to do but laugh. Once he was out of sight Clint pulled me back into his arms. I latched my arms around his shoulders.

“We really should escape while we can.” I nodded. “April, I’m kind of crazy about you.”

He used my real name again. I loved how it sounded in his voice. How crazy was that?

“Yeah?” He nodded. “I’m kind of crazy about you too babe.” He smirked. “Now let’s get the hell out of here. We’ve had a to be continued hanging in the air for way to long and I really, really want to get to it.”

His smirk got bigger. He let go of my waist and grabbed my hand then together we walked very briskly to his room to grab our stuff then to the car Stark had waiting for us. Clint’s apartment was closer so that was absolutely where we were going.


	7. You're mine now...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally in a Stark free building that 'almost' disappears. 
> 
> Porn without much plot.

As Stark had promised there was a car waiting for us when we reached the main entrance. It hurt to get in it. The painkillers weren’t doing much to help right now. Stupid ribs – how long would they take to heal? The second we sat down the driver asked where we were going. He sped off after Clint gave him the address and we’d clipped our seatbelts on. I say sped off, we were in the centre of New York. He drove about as fast as we would have walked – not that Clint could have walked any distance right now. 

One block into the drive Clint undid his seatbelt, moved in closer to me and started nuzzling into my neck. I moved a hand, tangled it in his hair and then closed my eyes. It was ridiculous how good that felt. I moaned softly, bit my lower lip. The longer he did the more my breathing hitched. How long was the drive? I really needed to get him alone and the way he’d just looked at me he was absolutely thinking the same thing.

He moved away from my neck and I turned to look at him. His eyes just burned into mine as he looked at me. He leaned down to me, slowly brushed his lips against mine. That was all he did.

“Sorry to interrupt but we’ve arrived.”

That was one interruption I didn’t mind. I moved away from him, practically leapt out the car and he was out seconds behind me. The walk up to his apartment though was painfully slow. He was on the fifth floor; the building elevator was out - again - and every step he took seemed to hurt him. He tried not to let it show, tried to talk to me, make jokes but by third floor the jokes stopped by the fourth he’d stopped talking too. I offered to carry him up the last floor. He told me to get lost and called me a rookie again. I left him to walk the last flight alone. He clearly didn’t want me to see him struggle. I stood at his front door and waited on him. He was slightly faster once he was back on flat ground, he looked slightly less pained too. It still took him a minute to reach the door.

“Took you long enough Barton.”

He stuck his tongue out at me. Very grown up. He didn’t reply, I watched him hunt for his house keys, open the door and then walk in. I didn’t move. I don’t know why. I’d been in his apartment before, I knew this is where we were going but suddenly I felt like I needed him to invite me in. He started talking but then turned back to me when he realised I wasn’t behind him.

“April?” I smiled. The novelty of hearing him say my real name hadn’t worn off yet, I don’t think it ever would. I loved hearing it. “Why aren’t you coming in?”

I didn’t say anything, didn’t move. If I walked in I knew what would happen and oh boy I wanted that but once we’d crossed that line we couldn’t go back. Then again we’d sort of crossed that line already. He put his hand out for me and when I took it he yanked me into his apartment and slammed the door shut behind me. It made the decision for me.

I shook off my jacket and dumped it on the floor along with my bag. That done I went back to staring at him. Could it really be…was that ‘almost’ about to disappear? I took the couple of steps I needed to reach him and rested my hands on his chest. He immediately put his hands on my waist. He leaned in to kiss me. I wanted that, I really wanted that but there was one thing I had to be sure of before I let myself get lost in the moment. I moved away from him, just slightly.

“Let me just check something.” He looked confused. Given our recent history it wouldn’t surprise me if he was here. “Stark! Stark if you’re here come out now!”

Clint laughed loudly but no-one answered. We were finally Stark free. It was a miracle. I leaned up to him and just as our lips brushed against each other a voice from behind me asked:

“Why would Stark be here? When did…oh crap…sorry.”

I moved away from him and Clint groaned. Kate was here. Kate had been one of Clint’s students. These days she was better known as the other Hawkeye and the last time Clint mentioned her she’d moved to the West Coast. Were we ever going to be alone? This was turning into a bad comedy and I was getting frustrated. Clint was too. Still, his exasperated tone when he spoke to Kate almost made me laugh.

“I thought you were going out tonight?”

“I am, I’m just leaving. It’s about damn time you two got together.” That did make me laugh or giggle anyway. “See you guys later.”

With that she walked out the apartment.

“I thought Kate was in LA?”

“It’s a long story, can I tell you later?” I nodded. “Now where were we?”

I moved a hand to the back of his head and pushed him down to me. It seemed to take forever but eventually our lips met and I just melted into him. The kiss was soft and gentle or is it was for a few seconds. That’s not what I wanted from him, not what we needed from each other right now. He moved a hand to the small of my back and pushed me into him. As he moved the other hand he caught my ribs, I couldn’t help it, I moved away from him, gave a little yelp in pain. He looked bereft.

“Sorry. I keep forgetting…I guess were both a little beaten up right now.”

I nodded. We were but that didn’t mean we couldn’t do what we wanted to, we just had to be a little gentler with each other. I looked at him. His eyes just burned into me.

“Clint.” He didn’t move. “Take me to your bedroom.”

He moved this time. He took my hand and led me the short distance to his room. I’d been in it once before. It was a mess then, now it was…chaotic was being nice about it. Not that it mattered right now. His bed was unmade but clutter free. That mattered. 

I stepped into him, tried to get myself as close to him as I could. His eyes never left mine, he gently placed a hand on my waist the other he used to cup the side of my face. I hooked mine over his shoulders. He really was gorgeous and for some reason he wanted me. 

“Is this really going to happen this time?” I nodded. It better happen. How long had we waited to get this far? “You sure you want…”

He didn’t need to ask the question, he’d asked it before and my answer hadn’t changed. I didn’t let him finish. I leaned up to him, crashed my lips against his and kissed him. Hard. He was quick to respond. He moved his hand from my waist to my back, pushed me close to him and once I was as close to him as I could be he moved his hands. Let them roam over my body. When he touched me his hands were rough, intense but he was careful to avoid my ribs and the cut on my arm. It was like he had to touch me to prove that this was real. I wanted him before this but in this moment I don’t think I’d ever wanted anything more. It was like I physically needed him.

Based on the way he was touching me he clearly felt the same way. I tangled my hands in his hair and he moaned softly. He moved away from me slightly and pulled at my hoodie. He manged to pull it off me, followed quickly by my t-shirt. That done he took a small step away from me and let out a low guttural growl. Before he could take off anything else of mine I traced my hands down his chest and when I reached it pulled his top off him. I could see them now, those beautiful arms of his. I traced a hand down his uninjured arm.

“God Clint these arms…” 

He grinned. I leaned up to him and brushed my lips against his, kissed him quickly. That wasn’t where I wanted to kiss him right now though. I moved down a little, started kissing the top of his arm. His breathing hitched and he let out a soft moan as I traced my lips across his wonderful toned arm. He tangled a hand in my hair. Yeah, he loved that. 

“Jesus...”

I didn’t stop. He didn’t want me too. After a while he moved a hand to the side of my face, pulled my head back up to him. We looked at each other for a second, neither of us seemed to know what to say. Instead he started backing me towards his bed. Three yards later I felt the edge of it against my legs, I didn’t have time to think about it, he gave me a gentle nudge and I allowed myself to fall down on it. Seconds later he was lying beside me, then kneeling over me.

“Look at you April. Your fucking stunning.”

I traced my hands up his chest.

“You’re not so bad yourself.”

He gently lowered himself down to me, started kissing my neck. I tangled one hand in his hair, traced the other slowly down his back. He sucked a bruise on my collarbone and then he did it again and again. I moaned every time. 

“Jesus Clint…please.” He stopped kissing me, moved to look at me again. I leaned up to him kissed him quickly. “Please.” 

He smirked. 

“Please what?”

“I want you. Please babe.”

“You want me to what?”

He was still smirking. He was teasing me now. Why was he teasing me? I could feel his cock hard against my leg, I knew he wanted me as much as I wanted him right now. Why play games? He moved a hand, slowly started tracing it up my leg but stopped at my thigh. I moaned.

“Clint please.” He didn’t move. “Fuck me.”

“Say it again.”

“Clint. I need you to fuck me. Now.”

He moved. He moved his hand from my thigh and I felt him tugging at the buttons of my jeans, it seemed to take him a lifetime to undo each one. By then I was tugging at his trousers, trying to pull them off him. He moved away from me, pulled them off himself and then quickly pulled mine off. He traced kisses slowly up one leg, ran a palm up the other. When he reached them he lingered at my thighs. God. That. Felt. Incredible. 

“Jesus Clint.” 

He moved away from me, kissed me roughly and then started slowly tracing his hands up my sides. I hummed with pleasure underneath him. When he reached them he pulled down my bra straps. I arched my back so he could unclip it. It hurt – I didn’t care. He threw it carelessly aside. Then went back to just looking at me.

“April…”

It was barely a whisper, almost a prayer and that was all he said. He leaned himself slowly down to me. My ribs twinged again, they didn’t matter right now. All that mattered was the feel of his skin against mine and it was heady. I traced my hands down his back as he nuzzled into my neck. He moved a hand slowly to cup my breasts then ran it slowly down my side and when he reached my panties he slowly slid his hand across them. I quivered at his touch. He did that once more before he started rubbing small circles over my clit through my panties. My breathing hitched and I started whispering his name. Jesus what was he doing to me, why did this feel so good? 

“You like that huh Red?” I whimpered. “You want more?”

I whimpered again. He started doing it again, rougher this time and I moved up into his touch. I dug my nails into him, traced them across his back. He moaned loudly, buried his head in the crook of neck and then yelled out my name in pleasure – thank God Kate had gone out. Then he did the unthinkable. He moved away from me again. Slowly traced his hands down my arms. When he reached my wrists he flicked them over my head and with his wonderful arms pinned me to the bed. I moved underneath him, tried to move out of his grip. I couldn’t, I had no chance and truthfully I didn’t really want to. He grinned at the sight of me.

“You’re not moving unless I want you to. Understand?” I nodded. “Good.” He leaned down to me, kissed me way to quickly. He was a tease. He wanted me as much as I wanted him. Why was he teasing me? “Much as I love knowing that I have that effect on you I don’t need anymore scratches right now Red.” I giggled. He moved so now he was only pinning me with one hand. I still couldn’t break free of him. He stared at me. “Not yet.”

With his free hand he managed to hook a finger in my underwear and pulled them off me. He moved enough that I could get out of his grip on me. My hands immediately sprung to his ass, I started pulling at his boxers. The second they were off he sprang back to me, pinned me back on his bed. With both hands. I stared at his arms. God those arms. He could do anything he wanted to me with those arms.

“What did I tell you?” I moaned. He moved, pinned me with one hand again. He leaned down to me. I thought he was going to kiss me, he didn’t. He nuzzled into my neck briefly then whispered in my ear. “You’ll get what you want, just not right now.” 

I moaned again. He smirked. How long was he going to tease me for? Did he want me to beg? Hadn’t I done that already? He trailed a hand across my stomach then slowly started tracing it down. The feel of his calloused hand had me shivering.

“I’m going let go of you now but no more scratches tonight. Deal?” 

I nodded. I wasn’t sure it was a promise I could keep. He let go. He moved a hand to my thigh, started slowly stroking the inside. I moved my hands to his back. He was still teasing me.

“Clint please. I want you…I need…”

I seemed incapable of asking him. He knew though. He pressed a finger against my clit, I arched into his hand, ignored the pain from my ribs. He did that a few times before he worked a finger inside of me and then a second. As he moved them in and out of me I let out a loud, deep moan and traced my hands across his back scratching him again. He grunted out my name.

“God Clint…I…Jesus that’s…babe please.”

He pushed himself against me and I felt his cock hard and hot against me. I moved my hands to his ass, pushed him against me. I don’t know where he got the strength to do it but he moved away from me, c’mon Clint please, please stop teasing me.

“Are you on…do we need?”

He struggled to ask but I knew what he meant. He didn’t need to worry.

“No I’m on…it’s fine.”

“I need to hear you say it again. Tell me what you want April.”

I traced a hand up his chest. He knew what I wanted, what I’d always wanted. 

“You Clint. I want you.” He didn’t move. “Clint fuck me.”

He leaned down to kiss me. It was needy and intense, almost harsh. The kiss was a clear sign that he was finally done teasing me. He’d better be. He was, he moved slightly and slowly pushed himself into me. The feeling of inside me, filling me as he pushed himself into me over and over again made me moan. I tangled my legs around him. Now that I had him I wasn’t let him go anytime soon. My breathing became shallow and Clint’s – I wasn’t even sure he was breathing. I closed my eyes, dug my nails into his hips. He growled.

“God Clint that’s…I…don’t stop.”

He pushed himself harder inside me and all I could do was groan in pleasure. I dragged my nails across his hips. He stopped moving. When he spoke he was taunting me.

“You broke your promise Red.”

What promise? Oh. Like I could stop myself. He was…this was. Intense. I couldn’t help it. I stared up at him. He moved his hands to my wrists, went back to pinning me to his bed. I whimpered, tried to break free. I didn’t try too hard I liked being at his mercy. He smirked. He leaned down to me crashed his lips into mine. The kiss was rough and intense and way, way too short. When it ended he started kissing my neck again. I moved my hips up to him and he groaned at the resulting friction.

“Jesus April…”

He lightly bit my shoulder and I let out a little squeak of surprise. That felt good, why did that feel so good? I wanted to move a hand to his head, I wanted him do to that again. I tried to move my hand, I couldn’t, he pinned me back down.  
“Again babe. Do that again.”

I moved my hips up to him again as he bit down on my shoulder – harder this time. I let out a long, low moan of pleasure. That done he went back to nuzzling into my neck. Before I could move up to him again he moved himself inside me. Pushed harder, faster, maybe a little frantic and Jesus it was crazy how good that felt. He had at me the edge, I rolled my head back. With one more push into me he wretched my orgasm from me. 

I shuddered underneath him, my entire body trembled and I made a noise I’d never heard myself make before - a mixture of pleasure and ecstasy. I dissolved into him, just melted in the intense bliss of it. He pushed himself into me another few times as I continued to tremble underneath him. Then his back tensed, his arms tense and he called out my name so loudly the whole damn building had probably heard it as he came inside me. It was only then that he let go of my wrists. I didn’t move.

After he pulled out of me he lay himself on top of me, nuzzled into my neck, tried to catch his breath. We both were. I latched my arms around him holding him close but then pain. My fucking ribs. I couldn’t stop myself, I squeaked in pain. Much as I wanted to stay close to him right now we just couldn’t do it that way. He looked at me apologetically, I didn’t need to tell him what was wrong. He knew. He moved to lie beside me, pulled me with him and I lay with my legs tangled in his, my head and a hand on his chest. That was better. He started tracing a hand slowly down my arm.

“Jesus that was…April. You’re mine now. Only mine. You know that?” Did I know that? I did. I was his. It just felt like that was how it should be. I nodded. Just to emphasise that point he moved a hand to my chin and tilted my face up him. His eyes were sparkling. He leaned down to me, brushed his lips against mine and kissed me. Slowly, sweetly, lovingly. The direct antithesis of every kiss we’d had tonight. It felt just as good. He moved away from me a little, started at me. The way he looked at me, like I was ethereal, like this didn’t seem real to him. “Your mine April and I’m yours.”

I moved away from him a little and traced my hands up his chest. I was grinning. I couldn’t help it. 

“Mine?”

He leaned up to me, kissed me quickly.

“Just yours April. I always have been.”

He pushed me back down to him. Mine. He was really mine. I nuzzled into his chest. He kissed the top of my head, wrapped an arm around me. Neither of us said anything else. We didn’t need to. After a few minutes I heard him snore underneath me. I fell asleep in his arms not long afterwards.


	8. Three months later...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three month later Red and Clint are still together.  
> Maria interrupts morning sex and the moment is gone ... or is it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was supposed to end this at chapter seven. I couldn't let the characters go.

I woke up to the feeling of Clint nuzzling into my neck. Three months, we’d been together for three months and the novelty of waking beside him still hadn’t worn off. Especially not when he woke me up like this. I moved a hand to his head, tangled it in his hair.

“Morning babe.” 

He mumbled a ‘morning’ into my neck, then went back to kissing it. Yeah this was a good way to wake up. I traced a hand down his back and stopped at his ass. He moaned into my neck, started tracing a hand up my side. My phone stared ringing. Seriously? I moved away from him. The look he gave me said it all. He didn’t have to worry about it. I had no intention of answering it. I didn’t even look at it, I just switched it to silent then dropped it on the floor. I looked back at him.

“Now, where were we?”

He smirked. I moved myself on top of him on the bed, then leaned down to kiss him. That’s when his phone rang. I was about to move away from him when he put his hands on my back and pushed me down to him.

“No you don’t. They can wait.”

Good. I crashed my lips against his, tried to ignore the Billie Holiday song blaring next to my ear. He traced his hands slowly down my sides and I leaned into him. Jesus that felt good. When he reached the bottom of my pyjama top he pulled it off me. By then Billie had stopped singing. I looked at him for a second, traced my hands up his chest.

“You really are stunning. These arms are just …”

I started tracing my lips down his wonderfully toned arm. I knew he loved that and he moaned underneath me. He didn’t give me long to do it, he flipped me onto my back.

“You’re not so bad yourself.”

I giggled but not for long. He leaned back down to me, went back to kissing my neck. I latched my legs around him. Billie started singing again. I stretched over, grabbed his phone and switched it to silent. I’d had enough of hearing her. That done I moved my hands back to his ass, pushed him into me. He moaned again.

Someone started banging at his room door. It could only be Kate. Why? We were being quite (ish) for a change. Clint bellowed at her.

“What is it Kate?”

“I don’t care what you’re doing in there, will one of you answer your God damn phone. Maria’s calling me now. Call her back. Now. I have better things to do than play secretary.”  
He moved away from me. Dammit. That was almost a good start to the day. We looked at each other, he seemed as disappointed as I was. Poor Kate, Maria should not be calling her to get to us, she sounded totally exasperated.

Maybe all we had to do was call Maria, then we could get back to each other. Maybe. It was never going to happen but a girl could dream. His phone vibrated with a call. He grabbed it, stuck it on speaker and barked down the phone:

“What!”

I had to choke down a laugh. He really wasn’t happy. I wasn’t either. Why couldn’t she have phoned maybe thirty minutes later? 

“Don’t yell at me Barton it’s ten in the morning. Your late. We need you. Get your ass in here.” I went to retrieve my phone from the other side of the room. Once I had it I looked at the time. Shit. So it was. No wonder she sounded pissed. I found my top and put it back on. The moment was well and truly gone. “Is Red with you?”

“I’m here Maria. Sorry. We’re on our way.”

“You’d better be.”

She hung up. I stared at him. Shit. Just shit. Why had neither of us set an alarm? She was right to be annoyed. 

“I guess we’d better move. She sounded pissed.”

“It’s ten in the morning babe, of course she’s pissed. Just be grateful it wasn’t Fury on the phone.” He laughed. “I’m going for a shower.”

I grabbed my clothes and started heading to the bathroom. He seemed to be doing the same thing. I stopped at the bathroom door and looked at him. He had that look. He wanted to finish what we’d started. Maybe the moment had entirely gone. Then again, we didn’t have time … we couldn’t … could we? 

“Are you trying to save on your water bill?” He smirked. “We don’t have time to …”

He leaned into me and smashed his lips onto mine. It was a good point and he made it well. We had time. He moved away from me as quickly as he’d kissed me.

“Yeah we do.”

He grabbed my hand and walked me into his bathroom. I squeaked. Somewhere in the background a voice yelled:

“Seriously!”

If Clint heard her, he didn’t let on. The second we were inside he switched the shower on, then turned face me. I bit my lip. This was going to be fun. He was staying a few yards away from me. I ditched my clothes, he did the same. He was still staring at me:

“Strip.” He barked it, it was an order. It took me by surprise. I didn’t move. Neither did he. “April, strip.” I moved, I did as I was told. I pulled my top over my head then latched a thumb in my pyjama shorts, pulled them down, then kicked them away from me. He watched every move I made. That done I went back to standing motionless. I saw his eyes wander up my body. “God you are fucking beautiful.” Then why was he so far away? “Get in the shower.”

I walked past him, knowing he was watching me and stepped into the shower. The warm water hitting my skin felt good. I turned to face him, I watched as he pulled off his pyjama bottoms. He was already hard. I bit my lip. Get in here babe. He stepped into the shower with me but didn’t get too close. I needed him closer to me than that.

“Clint…”

“Not another word unless I tell you to speak. Understand?” I nodded. He was taking control and I loved it, I loved when he dominated me like this and he knew it. “Turn around and put your hands on the wall.” I did as I was told. He stepped into me but still didn’t touch me. He seemed to stand there forever. The expectation of it was killing me. I needed him to touch me, to do so much more than that and soon.

“Clint…”

“What did I tell you?” I shut up. He put his hands on my shoulders and slowly started tracing them down my arm until he reached my hands. He stepped into me as I did that and now that he was close enough he started kissing my neck. I moaned softly. The feel of his skin against mine, his lips on my neck compounded with the water hitting me was just intoxicating. “Don’t move these hands. Understand?”

His voice was rough, low. He was commanding control and I was happy to do whatever he wanted, I knew how good he could make me feel. I nodded. He moved one hand, started tracing it up my thigh, I hummed in pleasure. I could feel his cock against me. Hard and hot and I wanted him inside me but it seemed like he was going to tease for a little longer. He moved his hand before he reached anywhere that mattered left it sitting on my hip. I let out a disappointed groaned. He chuckled.

“Patience.” 

He moved his other hand and placed it on my waist. He didn’t rest in there, he started tracing it slowly up my side. When he reached my breast he cupped it with his hand, gently squeezed it in a way he knew I loved. I moaned. He moved his other hand between my legs and I ground myself down into his palm. He barely let me enjoy the sensation of it, he worked a finger inside me and then a second one. Jesus. I moaned loudly. I could hear him behind me, his breathing was laboured, mine too. He went back to kissing my neck. 

“Clint. Please…”

“Did I tell you to speak?” I stayed quiet. “What is you want?” I stayed quiet again. “You can answer.”

“You, I want you.”

He knew that and I knew he wanted me too. He moved his hands, gripped my hips. Oh boy, I was about to get what I wanted. He pushed himself into me with one hard thrust. He let out a low guttural growl. I responded in kind. He did that a few times then moved a hand, started rubbing his thumb across my clit. 

“Jesus Clint that’s …”

He put a hand on my chin, turned my head to face him then crashed his lips into mine. That was one way to shut me up. He kept kissing me as he moved harder, faster, rocking himself in and out of me and a hot burning pleasure started forming, I knew I couldn’t hold on for much longer. He moved away from the kiss. I wanted, I needed that release, I moved back into him. He moved both hands back to my hips and dug his nails in causing a short, sharp pain that felt good. I moaned again. 

“Fuck April, this is …”

I wanted to respond, I couldn’t, I wasn’t allowed to speak. He thrust into me another few times and I felt myself clench around his cock. He pushed himself into me again. I couldn’t help it I spat out his name in ecstasy as I came. He pushed himself into me another few times before coming with a loud moan. It was so loud that Kate had to have heard it. I didn’t care. He took a step away from me. I turned around to face him. That was …. Jesus that was incredible. He leaned down to me and kissed me. Slowly, softly, sweetly.

He didn’t say anything. I watched him leave the shower, then watched as he dried off and dressed. That boy really was stunning. Three months, we’d been together for three and the sight of him still made me weak. Once he was out the bathroom I left the shower too. It took me a little longer to get ready. He was standing in his bedroom playing on his phone when I went back in. I stood in the doorframe and watched him. We’d just had sex in the shower, we’d never done that before. I absolutely wanted to do that again.

“I know you’re watching me.” He looked up from his phone. He had a huge grin on his face. “That was hot as hell. Right?” I nodded. “We’ll be doing that again.” I nodded again. I’m glad he felt the same way. I grabbed my jacket and bag from the other side of the room then walked back to him. “You ready to go?” I nodded a third time. “You’re not wearing any make-up.” I didn’t have time. Why was he commenting? Shit, did I look awful? He took the few steps he needed to reach me and traced a hand down the side of my face. “You should do it more often, you look beautiful. You don’t need it.”

I smiled. He leaned down to me, kissed me softly. If he really felt that way I’d be going make-up free more often. The kiss was heaven, it was also short. When he moved away from me we headed out to work. Kate was sitting on her laptop in the living room. She glared at us as we walked by. I would speak to Maria about calling her, she shouldn’t do that. It wasn’t fair. I felt like I had to apologise.

“Sorry about Maria. I’m going to speak to her about …” She grunted. “Kate we are sorry. Aren’t we?”

I looked at Clint, he just grunted. I sighed. Kate looked up at us.

“Don’t apologise, just answer your fucking phones. Also, maybe don’t have sex in the shower again. I need to use it to.” 

She went back to her computer. She was still irked but I guess we were done talking about it. She had a point. We didn’t have time to talk about it right now, it was time to get to work. Clint took my arm as we left his apartment and we started the ten blocks walk there. Three blocks in Clint stopped walking. We couldn’t. Could we? She’d kill us.

“We are not stopping for coffee. We’re already late, how would that look?”

He gave me his best puppy dog eyes. He knew I couldn’t say no to those eyes. We were already late, the place looked quiet and I liked the idea of having a caffeine hit before we walked in and got yelled at again appealed. I let him pull me into our favourite coffee house. Five minutes later we walked out with a coffee and a muffin each. I had to let go of his arm to eat. 

We swiped ourselves into the building and headed up to our desks. Maria was standing waiting on us when we stepped off the elevator. She sighed.

“You stopped for breakfast. Seriously?” I looked at her and then Cint, he was covered in muffin crumbs. I wiped them off. It was another excuse to touch him. Fury’s in the meeting room waiting. We started walking in that direction.

“Not you Red, you’re coming with me.”

I stopped walking, Clint did do. He looked apologetically at me. This has happened a few times now and he knew it was starting to get to me.

“Am I being side-lined again?” She sighed. “It’s because he’s going. Right? You never put us out on the field together anymore.”

“Clint get going.” Was my question being ignored? Clint stayed where he was. “Barton move your ass you’re already late. Red do not talk to me like that. You know better.”

I did but I was frustrated. Still I had to apologise there was no point in making it worse. Aside from the shower there wasn’t much about this morning that had gone well.

“Sorry. I’m just … I have a point. You know I do.”

“You went on mission with Clint last week.”

“Briefly and only because you needed a couple.” She nodded. “Why do I feel like I’m being punished for being with him? It’s not fair. Maria I’m just as good as ….”

“Red will you …”

“Well I am. Why does he always get to …”

“Red. It’s not that …”

“Why did you call us both in if all I was going to do was sit and watch…”

“Red, will you please…”

“I want to speak to Fury this…”

“Red! Shut the fuck up and listen to me.” I shut up. Maria not only yelled at me but she actually swore. She never did either of those things. Shit. Never being side-lined I would end up being suspended. I was about to apologise. She wouldn’t let me. “Not another word. You’re not going with them because you’re going on a separate mission. As team leader.”

Wait. What. Really? I smiled. I’d wanted this for a while now but Fury kept telling me I wasn’t ready yet.

“Seriously?”

“Yes Red. It’s a small team to apprehend someone else involved in the attack. Our intel suggests he’s at home right now with his girlfriend. You’re going in to get him. He’s only two blocks away.” I nodded. “Since your late …” I apologised again. “Your team is waiting for you. Let’s go in so I can brief you all on it.”

Team leader. Finally. I couldn’t wait.


	9. You're insatiable right now.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its time for Red to be team leader. Finally, but Clint's a big distraction.  
> Once the jobs done things start going awry with him. How did she get it so wrong?

Maria and I walked to one of our other meeting rooms. My team was waiting on me. It was a small team, there was four of us. It was all we needed and I knew everyone. Maria had given me a good team, I was more than happy. The main team was heading to a base to bring in three males who had started selling stolen SHIELD tech. Their job was to arrest the men and retrieve the tech. Their leader was a guy called Jason Perry, he was our target. He was two blocks away, we’d be going in to arrest him. He was potentially armed but since he was with his girlfriend and their son Maria reasoned he would be unlikely to shoot. We could hope.

We would be timing it so we went in at the same time as the other team, that meant leaving a little later. We sat with the plans for his home and planned a way to go in and take him if he tried to run a potential route and how to stop him. That done we headed out to get changed for the mission. I headed up to my room and changed into my SHIELD uniform. I went into my safe and pulled out my two guns, holstered done to my thigh, the other to my side. Hopefully I wouldn’t need them.

I was on my way back to meet my team when I realised I had one last thing I needed to do. I needed to tie my hair back. I headed to the locker room to grab a hair bobble. I had just finished braiding my hair when I heard someone walk in. I was about to walk out when I saw him. Clint. I smiled.

I knew I shouldn’t do it but I found myself unable to move. I stood where I was and watched him change. The light blue jeans, red check shirt, hoodie and white trainers he’d left his apartment wearing were replaced fairly quickly by his Hawkeye outfit - minus the bow. I loved him in the black and purple colours of it. As he pulled on his last boot he suddenly spoke:

“I know you’re watching me again Red.” Red not April? I guess we were both in our work gear. I giggled. He stood up. “You like what you see?” I started walking towards him. Did I like what I saw? I always did when I was looking at him and he knew that. When I finally reached him I put my hands on his chest and traced them slowly upwards. He grabbed my waist and pulled me into him. “Is that a yes?”

I didn’t answer him, instead I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and leaned up to him. When our lips finally met I kissed him slowly and he responded in kind. He moved his hands, slowly traced them down to my ass. I moaned softly. After that the kiss became more heated. I wanted him. Maybe, just maybe we could get away with doing more. I moved my hands to his hips, burrowed them underneath his top and dug my nails into his skin. He growled. He moved his hands away from my waist, grabbed my wrists then stepped into me until my back hit the lockers. He then pinned my wrists above my head, moved away from me and stared at me. My breathing hitched. I wanted him and he wanted me. That was all that mattered right now.

“Jesus April, you’re insatiable right now aren’t you?” 

Was I? Maybe I was. If I was it was his fault. I leaned up to him, kissed him quickly.

“Are you complaining?”

“Absolutely not.”

He gave me a cheeky grin then stepped into me, crashed his lips into mine and we were back in that heated kiss again. I arched my back, I needed to get as close to him as I could. I tried to move my arms, he wouldn’t let me and dammit I loved it when he did that to me. I moaned loudly, it made him kiss me harder. Someone close by sighed.

“Barton put the girl down and get back to work. We’re waiting on you. Again.”

Nat. At least it was Nat and not Maria. He stepped away from me and I took one step away from the lockers. He took one last look at me before he started walking away. He looked as disappointed as I was as he did. As he reached Nat he turned back to me.

“You’re going to be great as team leader today. See you when I get back.”

He didn’t give me a chance to reply he walked out with Nat. I smiled. I guess I should go back to work too. I headed back to my team. When I walked into the room Maria gave me a funny look. Why? We weren’t leaving just yet, we had to wait until the other team were almost at their location. Maria gave us a pep talk and as she was heading back to the ops centre stopped at my side and quietly whispered in my ear:

“Two things Red. Firstly you’re going to do great today.” I smiled. “Second of all – I don’t know what you’ve been up to with that boy but you need to fix your hair.”

Really? That explained the look earlier. I giggled as she walked out. I pulled my hair out of its braid and pulled it into a high ponytail instead. I stood and talked to my team until it was time to go. We all headed down to the garage and piled into a van. The guy was two blocks away it didn’t take us long to drive there. I had enough time to put in my ear piece and hear Nat bark out orders to her team mates. They’d arrived. I waited on her signal, it didn’t take long.

I gave my team the go signal and we headed out. Five minutes later he was sitting handcuffed with one of team in the van. He hadn’t been armed and not wanting to cause a scene in front of his child he surrendered to us almost instantly. His girlfriend let us into the house and after a search we couldn’t find any stolen merchandise in there. When we asked him, he denied ‘bringing his work home with him’. I believed him. We headed back to base. I told the other team we were on the way back. They had arrested their targets but were still retrieving stolen tech from the base. 

When we arrived at HQ a team met us and escorted Jason to an interview room. Fury wanted to interview him, my job was done for the day. Except the paperwork. There was always the stupid paperwork. My team headed up to the mess, I headed to my desk via the mess. They could make me do paperwork but I wouldn’t do it without caffeine. I stood talking to my team for a few minutes but couldn’t delay it much longer.

Maria was standing at my desk waiting on me. I gave her a quick debrief, she hugged me and told me I’d done well before leaving me to get back to work. I sat at my desk ready to write up my report. I still had my earpiece in. I went to take it out when it blipped back to life. Stark was reporting in, saying they were finally on their way back. Good if I wrote this quickly I might be finished by the time Clint got back to base. I raided around for a pen and just as I found one Stark’s voice started blaring in my ear again.

“Why were you late this morning anyway Barton? Did Red keep you up all night?” Someone grunted. I’m guessing Clint. I shouldn’t be able to hear him. I guess he was sitting right next to Tony’s earpiece. “No … Not all night then. This morning …. Look at your face. I’m right. Someone got laid this morning. That’s a damn good reason to be late.”

He hadn’t done this on purpose. Stark was a pain in the ass at times but he wasn’t like this. He wouldn’t want anyone else hearing this. He’d forgot to shut it off. Why was he baiting Clint though? Again. It was his favourite hobby these days. It didn’t help that Clint wasn’t very good at ignoring him when he started in on him.

“Stark would you shut up.”

“Why? Tell me this then. Is it getting serious between you two?”

“Shut it.”

“Just tell me. Do you love her? Am I getting a wedding invite soon?”

“Stark drop it.”

Why wasn’t anyone else chiming in? Could no-one else hear this? Nat wouldn’t let this conversation go on.

“Answer the question. What’s going on with you and Red?”

“Shut the hell up.”

“I’ve hit a sore spot. You want to get serious and she doesn’t. Is that it?”

“Seriously Stark drop it.”

“Oh. Oh. There really is trouble in paradise. So much for true love.”

“It’s not love Stark. She’s a great lay and we have fun. That’s it. Alright?”

“Jeez, sorry don’t snap at me.”

I didn’t want to hear anything else. I couldn’t … I didn’t need to. ‘A great lay’. That’s what he thought of me? That was all I meant to him? I thought we … how fucking stupid am I? I was in love with him and he was ‘having fun’. I looked around. If anyone else had heard it they weren’t letting on. I wanted to cry. Check that, I wanted to kill him. I wasn’t going to cry, I was going to get mad …. then even. I thumped the desk. I saw Maria looking over at me.

“Red. Everything okay?” I nodded. “You sure?” 

I guess she hadn’t heard that then. Maybe I’d saved myself some embarrassment. The only people who’d heard it was me and the car full of people the asshole was travelling with. I couldn’t do much about it right now. I didn’t want to see him when he got back. If I rushed through this report I wouldn’t need to.


	10. You get that I was talking to Stark right?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After hearing Clint describe her as a great lay and not much else all Red wanted to do is get out of there before she sees him again.
> 
> Life doesn't work like that.

Writing up my report took me thirty minutes. It felt like an eternity. I sent it to Maria but I had to wait on her approving it before it was officially done. I stood over her as she read. I was still livid, I wasn’t going home. I needed to vent off some of this anger. I think I’d go to the firing range instead. Get some target practice in. Pretend he was the target. Then maybe head to a bar and get ridiculously drunk. It seemed like a good plan. Getting black-out drunk might make me forget him. I could hope. I started tapping my foot. I needed to get out of here.

“You in a hurry?”

“I want to go to the firing range before I go home. That’s all.”

“Are you okay, you seem irked?” Irked was putting it mildly. I didn’t want to talk about it. I’d embarrassed myself enough for one lifetime already. I nodded. She didn’t believe me. “The reports fine. On you go.” I started walking away. “Red, be on time tomorrow.”

I sighed, I’d be on time. I might even be early. I would just be very, very hungover. I promised her I’d be on time but I didn’t promise her I’d would be fit for work. I’d taken two steps out the office when I saw Stark. Yeah, I wasn’t in the mood to deal with him either. Not that this was his fault but still. I’d taken another few steps towards the stairs when I saw him. Still in his Hawkeye gear and just for a second I forgot I forgot I was mad at him, just forgot a second I thought about good he looked in it. Then I heard the words ‘A great lay and we have fun’ in my head and it all came flooding back. I could walk the other way to the range, I turned away from him and started walking again.

“Red.” Fuck you Barton. I kept walking. Less than a minute later he was walking beside me. He tried to take my hand. Yeah right. I moved it away from him. “What’s wrong?” I kept walking. Maybe if I said nothing he would just disappear. “April?”

His voice had changed. He knew something wasn’t right. I didn’t want to talk to him, I knew I would have to eventually. Not while I was this angry and certainly not here. He had to leave me alone.

“Go away.”

“Why?”

He tried to take my hand again. I moved away from him. I didn’t even want to look at him much less have him touch me. He clearly wasn’t giving up. I gave up walking away from him. I started running away from him instead.

“April?” He started running with me, he was slightly faster. When he reached me he stood in front of me. I stepped to the side, started walking again. “April what’s going on?”

What’s going on? I’m sure he’d figure it out, I wasn’t going to tell him. I had to make him leave me alone though. I couldn’t be held responsible for what would happen if he didn’t.

“Leave me the fuck alone Barton.” He looked like he was going to say something, I didn’t want to hear it. “Just don’t. I don’t want to hear it. We’re done.”

His face fell. He hadn’t expected that. This time when I walked away again he let me. I hadn’t meant to say that last part in front of everyone. I hadn’t meant to say it at all. Surely, I didn’t need to. Too late now. I stomped down the rest of the corridor, down two flights of stairs and then along the corridor again until I reached the firing range. When I walked in someone was using it. Bucky. Shit. There was more than one target, I could still shoot but I didn’t want to be around anyone right now. Bucky pulled off his ear guards and said ‘hi’ before I could walk back out again.

“Hi Bucky. Sorry to disturb you.”

“You didn’t. Are you okay?”

I wasn’t but Bucky was not the person to talk to about it.

“I’m fine. I’m going to go to the archery range instead. I’ll see you later.”

I turned to walk away. He wouldn’t let me.

“Red, are you sure you’re okay?”

I must look as bad as I felt. I turned back to him.

“Never fall in love Buck. Nothing hurts like heartbreak.”

I didn’t let him say anything in reply, I walked out. I’d just told him more that I should have. I walked next door to the archery range. No-one was here. There was only three or four of us that ever used it, it was usually empty. I grabbed my favourite bow and a quiver full of arrows and headed to a target. This wasn’t going to be as cathartic as shooting a gun, but it was close. I let off two arrows. My test arrow was just a little off the centre, the second was dead on. I loaded the bow for a third time and as I was standing up I saw him out the corner of me eye. Couldn’t he take a hint?

He was standing in the doorframe watching me. He was out of his Hawkeye costume. He was looking like my Clint again. Except. He wasn’t my Clint anymore was he? Based on his comments he never was. I was an idiot. Why had he followed me here? He had to know I didn’t want to talk to him, I didn’t want to look at his face, I didn’t even want to think about him. He wasn’t giving me a choice. I turned around to him and moved my bow with me, pointed in squarely at his cold, shallow heart.

“I taught you better than that. You don’t point a loaded bow at someone unless you intend to fire it.” I didn’t move. “Fine. You get one shot Red you’d better not miss.” He stayed perfectly still. He’d taught me well. I might prefer shooting a gun but I was just as good with a bow. I never missed and he knew that. “Tell me this first though because I want to know before you shoot me. What did I do?”

What did he do? I stared him down. He knew. He had to know. Didn’t he?

“I heard you.” He didn’t move. “Stark still had his comms on asshole. I heard what you said about me.”

“Oh shit.” His face fell. Shit is right. That’s why I’m angry asshole. Now go away. “April it’s not what you think.”

April. My real name. Again. He had to be kidding. He forfeited that right now.

“It’s Red to you.”

“April.” Asshole. Using that name wasn’t going to soften how I was feeling towards you right now. “It’s really not what you think.” Not what I thought? I listened as he told Stark I was a ‘great lay’ and not much else, there wasn’t much room for interpretation there. I moved the bow, aimed just over his shoulder and let the arrow go. It hit the top of the doorframe. That made him move. He jumped, stepped back out the door. He looked scared. “Jesus April. I didn’t think you’d actually … what if you’d misjudged that?”

“You taught me well Barton. I don’t miss.” I pulled another arrow out of my quiver, reloaded my bow then went back to aiming it at his empty heart. “It won’t be the doorframe next time. Go away.”

He didn’t move. Did he think I was kidding? I moved slightly, released the arrow and hit the opposite side of the door frame. He jumped again. I bent down to pick up another arrow and that’s when I heard him running. Good, he was leaving. I would to, it was time to get drunk. I left the bow sitting in its stand. When I looked up he wasn’t running away, he was running straight to me. Fuck. I didn’t have time to plan what to do next. He reached me and knocked me to the ground. We tussled around the floor for a minute. I couldn’t get away from him. I gave up when he had me pinned on my back to the floor with my wrists. He was kneeling over me, pinning my legs together. He had me, I couldn’t move.

“That’s enough of that. You’re going to listen me.”

“I don’t want to hear it Barton. Fuck off”

I tried to move underneath him. It was never going to happen. Dammit. Why couldn’t he just leave me alone? If that’s what he thought of me, if that’s all this had been to him then I didn’t want anything else to do with him. Ever.

“No. You need to hear this.” I turned away from him. I didn’t want to look at him, into those that eyes that I loved. I didn’t want to see him as he tried to justify his comments. I thought we meant something to each other. It had been about more that great sex to me. I thought it had to him too. “April look at me.”

I moved. I tried to push his arms up, he didn’t move, at all. I tried to kick myself out of his grasp but he still didn’t move. Shit. He could talk, I didn’t need to listen, or look at him. Maybe I could talk him into letting me go.

“Barton, it’s over. If that’s what you think of me, if that’s all this was to you then just walk away.” He didn’t move. Dammit. “Let me go.”

He hadn’t moved and I didn’t think he was going to. I looked up at him. His eyes were … he seemed pained. Why? Was he sorry he’d been heard? Sorry to be losing a ‘great lay’?

“I will when you listen to what I have to say.” I spat out the word ‘fine’ at him. I was still angry, I don’t think I’d ever been so angry. He could say it and I might even listen. If that’s what it took to make him let me go then fine. “You get that I was talking to Stark right?” I nodded. So? “That he’s one of the biggest gossips around here?” I guess that was true. “I’m not going to talk to him about us, especially not in a car full of other staff.” 

“You did anyway. I’ve listened Barton, now let me go.”

“Not yet. I shouldn’t have said what I did. You have to know that I didn’t mean it.” What? “I’m sorry April. I’m sorry you heard it but more than that I’m just sorry I said it. I was the moment it was out my mouth. Stark was bugging me, he wouldn’t shut up and I wanted him off my back. You mean so much more than that to me, you have to know that by now.”

“I don’t.” He looked confused. “We never talk about ... not since we got together. I don’t know because you never tell me.”

He didn’t move, I wasn’t sure he was breathing anymore. His grip loosened, I could move now if I wanted to. I didn’t want to. I wanted to know what he was going to say next.

“That’s fair. I’m not good at … it’s not easy for me to say what I’m feeling.” 

I knew that, it’s why I’d never pushed him to have a ‘What are we?’ or ‘Where are we going?’ conversation. I didn’t think we needed to but after hearing that today … if that wasn’t what this was to him then I needed him to say what it was. Otherwise we were … I didn’t want to walk away from him but after hearing him talk about me like that I might have to.

“Clint, I need you to try … after hearing that I …”

I couldn’t finish, he knew what I needed though. He let go of my wrists and moved away from me. I sat up beside him. He latched an arm around my shoulder and pulled me into him. I rested my head on his shoulder. I needed him to talk to me and I wasn’t going to say anything else to him until he did.

“We’ve not been together for that long.” True. “But I know that…” He was silent again. He really was struggling. I looked at him. Come on Clint talk to me. He traced a hand down the side of my face. “I know that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you April.”

That I wasn’t expecting. Not the first part anyway. Until I heard him today I had thought that maybe he loved me, couldn’t understand why I’d got that so wrong earlier. I guess I hadn’t. He loved me, I smiled. Now for the first part. The rest of his life? Wow. That sounded pretty good to me.

“Do you really mean that?”

“Of course I do. April, I certainly wasn’t telling Stark that when I hadn’t told you, I still shouldn’t have said what I did though. I’m an idiot.”

“Maybe, but you’re my idiot.” 

And he was. He smirked. I wasn’t angry at him anymore. He kind of had a point about Stark and now that I knew he hadn’t meant it, I could forgive the comment. I cared about him too much to let something like this trip us up.

“You still want me.” I nodded then leaned my forehead against his. “Thank God for that.”

“I haven’t said yet but I love you too.”

I leaned into him and kissed him quickly. He wanted more than that. He moved back down to me brushed his lips against mine and we lost ourselves in a slow, loving kiss. I tangled a hand in his hair and he moaned softly. He pushed me back to the floor pinned my arms again, this time I was more than happy to be there with him. Things got heated pretty quickly. He’d just started kissing my neck when a voice close by chimed in:

“Red, I’m finished in … shit sorry. I guess you’re done with being heartbroken.”

He chuckled. Bucky was out of the firing range then. The moment was gone. We moved away from each other. I didn’t need the firing range anymore. My bloodlust was gone. I looked up at Bucky.

“Yeah.”

He smiled then immediately became awkward around us. I wasn’t surprised Clint and I were still half tangled in each other. He walked back out without saying anything else.

“You told Bucky you were heartbroken?” I nodded. “I’m sorry I put you through that.” I leaned into him and kissed him quickly. “When you were … I thought I’d lost you and I couldn’t bear that. I really do love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Also, you are a great lay.” 

I jokingly hit him on the shoulder and laughed. It was just as well I loved him.

“You are too babe.” 

He grinned. I knew what he was thinking. It sounded good to me.

“Speaking of that, now that you’re not threatening to shoot me anymore, why don’t we get out of here?”

I moved away from him and stood up, he was quick to join me. Once we were both standing he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into him, I latched my arms around his neck. Yeah, I was definitely done with being angry at him. He’d managed to talk his way back into my good graces and back into my bed.


	11. Back at Clint's apartment...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now that the 'I love you's' have been said all April wants to do is get Clint alone, when she final does Clint has one more surprise in store for her.

“Your place or mine?” 

I shook my head. He looked confused. After hearing him telling me he loved me for the first time, after everything that had just happened, I didn’t really want to wait. I wanted, needed to be with him and we didn’t need to travel far for that to happen. I leaned up to him and kissed him quickly.

“Let’s go up to my room at the staff living quarters.”

He smiled. Yeah, he liked that idea. We weren’t getting to go just yet. Maria walked into the room. Why was she here? I’d never seen her in here before. I moved away from Clint. 

“This isn’t the firing range I thought you’d be in.”

“Bucky was in the other one. Is everything okay?”

It was, she just had a question about my report. She’d already checked it over but okay. It wasn’t anything difficult. We talked about it for a couple of minutes. When I turned back to Clint he had a deep thought brewing.

“How was it being team leader? The little I heard on the comm’s sounded like you were doing well.”

“I was terrified when it was time to go but as soon as we were on the way I was fine. It wasn’t a complicated mission. It went as well as it was ever going to but I loved it. Clint, I really loved it.”

“You’ll get to do it again soon Red.”

I smiled. No-one said anything else, there wasn’t much else to say so we said goodbye. We had somewhere else to be. We had taken maybe three steps when Maria’s voice started booming through the room:

“Which one of you two idiots used the door frame as a target!”

I looked at Clint. Shit. I couldn’t reach them to take them out, neither could he. There was only one thing do to instead. We both knew what we had to do now.

We ran. I could hear Maria laughing at us in the background. At least she wasn’t mad. We kept running until we reached the stairwell. The second we stopped we started laughing. Not for long though, he started pulling me up the stairs. A few people tried to talk to us as we walked to my room. We didn’t really let them. We weren’t rude but there was something more important we wanted to do. It took me two attempts to swipe myself into my room. I really hated these key cards, I could never work them.

Once inside we stood there looking at each other. He loved me. This amazing guy standing in front of me loved me. Life didn’t get better than that, it just didn’t. I reached out to touch him and felt my arm graze against my gun. Touching him would have to wait a little longer. I moved away from him, put my guns and holsters in the their safe, then turned back to face him. I’d taken two steps back in is direction when his phone rang. I stopped walking. We both stared in the direction of the noise. He had no choice, he had to answer it. We should have left the building when we had the chance earlier. 

His side of the conversation mainly consisted of: ‘Yes sir’s’ and ‘Okay’s’. It ended with an: ‘I’ll get on it first thing tomorrow’. I liked that, it meant he wasn’t heading back to work. When he hung up he looked at me apologetically.

“Coming up here was a bad idea. People know we’re still in the building. We’re never going to get peace here and heaven help us if Fury see’s those arrows in the doorframe. We should head out.”

I agreed. We debated going back to my apartment but for some reason he was adamant about going back to his. I was okay with that, though after this morning I wasn’t so sure Kate would be. He took my arm and we sped walked to his apartment. I got a few funny looks en-route. It took me longer than it should have to realise it was because I was still in my Shield uniform. It was a breach of protocol. Shit. It was too late to change now. I zipped up my jacket – it made it much less noticeable.

When we walked in to Clint’s apartment Kate wasn’t there. She’d left a note on his bedroom door saying she was following a lead on a case and was heading back to LA for a couple of weeks. There was an N.B at the bottom: ‘It’s still not okay to fuck in the shower again just because I’m not here.’. We both laughed. She can’t find us that intolerable, she would have moved out by now if she did. He scrunched the note up, flung it on the floor and walked me into his room. The room was a mess, it didn’t seem this messy when we left it this morning. One day he’d have to tidy it. Not today.

He let go of my hand and walked to the other side of the room, took off his jacket and kicked off his trainers. That done he looked back to me. I dropped my bag on the floor, took off my jacket and flung it to the floor. He went from looking at me to ogling me. I kept going, I pulled off my uniform top. Then stopped.

“Keep going April.”

His voice was predatory as he barked his demand at me. Something about the tone and the way he was looking at me made me wet. I was ready for him and he still hadn’t touched me in any way. I loved him like this with me and he loved it just as much. I did as I was told. I pulled off the black vest top I wore underneath my shield top. He stayed motionless. I kicked off my shoes and socks then slowly, too slowly I started pulling down my trousers. He growled at me and I smirked.   
Once they were off, I kicked them away then stopped moving. I stood there motionless in the matching purple underwear set he loved. Neither of us moved, our eyes were locked on each other, but I didn’t want to walk to him. If he wanted me, he could come and get me. I knew he would. In an achingly slow motion I started pulling down a bra strap. He broke, he started walking over to me. The second he was close enough I ran my hands down his muscular chest and when I reached the bottom of his t-shirt pulled it off him. I thought he was going to kiss me, at least touch me. He didn’t he stepped back. What the hell?

“You’re such a fucking tease April.” I nodded. So was he. “Don’t stop.”

With one bra strap now down I moved to take off the other one. By the time I’d done it he still hadn’t touched me, and I needed that to change. We’d both stopped moving again. Everything in the room was quiet, still and there was a tension an expectation and one of us had to break it. Soon.

“I said don’t stop.” 

I didn’t move. For some reason I couldn’t. That tension still hadn’t broken, I seemed to be incapable of breaking it. He stepped into me and my heart started racing. He was about to break it. Barely. One finger, he touched me with one finger. He used to tilt my chin up to him. It wasn’t enough. Not even close. Once he’d done that he moved his hand away from face. 

“Clint…”

I was pleading with him, or I was going to go. I couldn’t say more than in his name. He moved a hand to my chest, started playing with lace at the edge of my bra. When he touched my skin, it was accidental. He was toying with me; we were toying with each other, but it couldn’t last. It just couldn’t. It didn’t. He moved quickly. He moved a hand to my back, unclasped my bra and flung it roughly to the floor. Once he had he picked me up and carried me over his shoulder. I squeaked. Of all the things I’d expected, I’d hoped he do to me that wasn’t one of them.

A few yards later we reached his bed and he threw me roughly onto it. The impact made me bounce against the mattress and I giggled. I couldn’t help it. I watched him intently as he pulled off his jeans and socks as quickly as his hands would let him. He then knelt astride me on the bed. He leaned himself down to me on his forearms so he hovered just above me and I could feel his cock hot and hard against my thigh. Why was he delaying this? I moved my hands to his waist.

“You’re fucking gorgeous April; I can’t believe your mine.”

“Back at you babe.” 

He grinned. I moved my hands to his ass and let them linger for a minute as he hummed in pleasure above me. I then hooked my finger in the elastic of his boxers and together we managed to pull them off him. Now there was only one flimsy piece of purple cloth between us. He didn’t tease me. He traced a hand down my side, down to my waist then my hips and when he reached them quickly pulled my knickers off me.

He leaned down to me again and didn’t leave any distance between us, instead he lay himself on top of me and started nuzzling into my neck. My hands moved themselves to his waist again. He started kissing my neck and it was rough and hot and needy. I moved a hand to his head, tangled it in his hair and locked his head there. He groaned as I gave his hair a sharp tug. His left hand started tracing its way from my hip upwards. When he reached my breast he stopped, moved to cup it.

“Babe that’s … don’t stop.”

I arched my back, closed what little distance there was between us. He stopped kissing my neck, moved to look at me - just for a second. Then he leaned down and crashed his lips into mine. The kiss was messy and sloppy and frantic and perfect. I needed more, I needed him. All of him. He moved again – went back to looking at me.

“I fucking love you.”

I smiled, I was never going to get sick of hearing him say that. Right now though I wanted, desperately needed something else from him. I traced a hand down the side of his face.

“Yeah?” He nodded. “Well I love fucking you.”

He growled then smirked. A big, wide cheesy smirk.

“I do love it when you talk like that.” 

That I knew. He was done talking, he gave me exactly what I wanted. He moved a little, positioned himself where he needed to be and pushed himself inside me. My eyes rolled to the back of my head. Jesus that felt good. He leaned himself down onto me and went back to nuzzling into my neck. I tangled one hand in is hair, the other I started tracing down his back. He sighed loudly.

“Jesus April…”

I wrapped my legs around his waist as he pushed himself into me again. I moaned loudly. How could he always make me feel this way, why did this always feel this incredible? Nothing else mattered right now but this, but him, but how good he was making me feel.

As he pushed himself repeatedly into me his hands roamed over my body. He seemed to touch everywhere at the same time and the sensation of his hands rough against me was intoxicating, he was intoxicating. A lifetime of being with him like this would never be enough.

“Fuck. Clint that’s … fuck.”

His hands finally stopped roaming and lingered at my clit. His finger slowly and deliberately ran across it again and again and again and I squirmed in pleasure underneath him, moaning loudly at every stroke. He had me close to edge and he knew it. So he stopped and looked up at me.

“Babe, please. I want…”

I couldn’t finish, he knew what I wanted. So why had he stopped moving?

“Say it.” I stared at him. “Tell me April.”

“I want you to make me come.”

“Yes Ma’am.”

He rocked his hips again, pushed himself roughly into me then kept going and damn it that felt so good. Together we were a sweating, trembling, hot mass of limbs and we got lost in each other. He was stunning and he was so good at this and right now he seemed to be whispering my name on repeat. When he looked at me, it was like I was ethereal, like I was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen and I’m damn sure I was looking at him the same way. My wonderful archer. He rocked his hips again and I felt that friction, that wonderful friction. I dug my nails into his skin and he didn’t even flinch. 

Every muscle in my body seemed to tense up all at once and the sensation of it came in waves and with what little breath I had left I cried out his name as I came. Hard. I trembled underneath him, with one last thrust Clint shuddered on top of me. Cursed as he came inside me. He stayed still for a minute then moved away from me and lay himself next to me on the bed.

“Jesus April that was…”

I turned on my side to face him, moved a hand to his chest.

“Yes, it was. I guess there was a reason you called me a ‘good lay’ earlier.” He looked at me apologetically. Shit. I meant that as a joke. He hadn’t taken it that way. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I really am sorry you know.” I nodded. “Stark touched a nerve that’s all.” Touched a nerve? What the hell did that mean? “I love you April.” I smiled. “Now that I’ve said it, it’s easier to say. I don’t know why I couldn’t before. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

He flipped me onto my back, pinned my arms against the bed. I giggled.

“Say it again.”

“I love you.”

“Do you love me enough to marry me?” I laughed. Where had that come from? “I’m serious April. Marry me?”

I stared at him. It didn’t seem like he was joking but he couldn’t mean that. Could he? Is that what he meant when he said Stark had struck a nerve – he’d joked about a wedding invite. We’d only been together for three months. Yet … I wanted to say yes. Was that crazy? It was, he didn’t mean it. Did he?

“I’m not answering that. You don’t mean it, if you did you would have bought a ring.”

He moved away from me, went into his top drawer and came back to me. That’s when the reason that he’d insisted on coming here became clear. He had a ring box in his hand. He opened it and inside was a beautiful engagement ring. A simple solitaire design: white gold with a square diamond in the centre. It was stunning.

“I did. I’ve had it for a couple of weeks now. I just had no idea how to ask you and I was scared to say ‘I love you’ in case you didn’t feel the same way. April, I love you and I meant it when I asked you to marry me. So, will you?”

Two weeks. He’d had this in his room for two weeks. If today hadn’t happened, if I hadn’t heard him talk to Stark how much longer would it have sat in that drawer? It didn’t matter we were here now and the answer I thought about earlier seemed like the right one. Maybe it was a little fast. I couldn’t make myself care. It felt right. He was staring at me, waiting on an answer.

“Your sure?” He nodded. “Then yes.”

“Really?”

“Did you expect any other answer?”

“I wasn’t sure. I know it’s fast.”

“Maybe. I don’t care. Do you?” He shook his head. I smiled. We were getting married. Eep. He slipped the ring on my finger, it was a perfect fit. I looked at it for a minute. It felt like it belonged there, like my hand was always meant wear this ring, his ring. “The ring is perfect babe. I love it, I love you.”

He reached over and took my hand, started playing with it.

“I love you too. Let’s go out and celebrate.”

I started at him. We could celebrate later.

“Let’s stay here and celebrate.”

I pulled him down to me and we were quickly tangled in each other again.


End file.
